Happiness - Hurts - Album Review
According to hmv.com, I pre-ordered my copy of Happiness on the 30th of May. I remember doing it, it was listed as Hurts - TBC. At that time, they had one video on youtube, Wonderful Life. This was followed up by what you probably watched if you were a gullible Muse fan who has Facebook, Better Than Love, with Blood, Tears & Gold preceding that. With each song that was put up on youtube, I became more and more excited. Rarely has a band came out of nowhere with songs as polished and brilliant as these, so I could hardly wait for when the album came out (and when it was actually given a title). Seeing them at T in the Park only whetted my apetite further, their haunting live show giving a taster of what other wonders were to come in September.
My copy of Hapiness only plopped on to my doormat on Saturday, but since then it's never been off. It's signed into the bargain, so when they become huge, i'll be able to boast at having a real collectable in my CD collection (or send it straight to ebay if i've falled on hard times). My first problem with listening to the album was the way I had mentally divided it up in my mind. I already knew four songs, the 3 mentioned before and Illuminated, as they were all on youtube and i'd hardly had them off in the run-up to hearing the album. This does create a bit of a problem as it makes the album feel disjointed as you listen to it, but it's certainly boosted by the fact that the rest of the songs are all on a par with what you'd heard already. Each track, even the duet with Kylie Minogue and the rather depressing closer The Water, is a complete work of art, an emotive masterpiece from one of the up and coming passionate singers in music today. Theo Hutchcraft's vocal work is a rare find in todays world of auto-tune and crap new music, one which sounds both polished and yet passionate with every syllable he sings.
The general theme of Happiness leaves its title a complete oxymoron, the majority of the songs are heartfelt pleas to an unknown woman (or, Evelyn) and in each instance of this, you can feel the pain that's in the voice. This is surprising, considering a work of such deep meaning has such a polished, stylised feel to it. Hurts' music is as much about the image as the actual lyrical content, and it does suffer from this at times. There are moments where you feel that whoever produced it (self-produced in the majority, now that I checked) was focusing too much on touching it up and making it just right, and forgot the essence of what was originally there. Thankfully, whenever this happens it simply adds to the charm, so youre enjoyment wont be detracted from as you have it on. Even the occaisonal burst from opera man (another reason to experience them live) doesn't feel too over the top, all of the eccentricities combine into one beautiful package which makes you think, these two (and whomever they have backing them, as there only are two official members of Hurts) are going places.
Ultimately, although i've only had a short time to listen to the album in full, I can tell that it's an instant classic. As I have mentioned before, it irks me greatly that Manchester has produced two brilliant bands and debuts in one year (the other being Acolyte by Delphic), two albums that are definate contenders for album of the year into the bargain. All we have to do now is hope that Hurts stick around for longer than this one effort, as they certainly deserve all the fame they get.
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Next week, i'll review Flamingo by 1/2 of The Killers
Sunday, 5 September 2010
Wednesday, 1 September 2010
Things I Have an Opinion On #25
The true identity of The Stig being revealed to be a petty little man who will struggle to find employment anywhere.
The above video contains an extremely bad rip of an episode of Top Gear, in which the 4 presenters raced against each other to find the quickest way from one side of London to the other. The Stig, the until recently anonymous driver for the programme, used public transport, and what you see in the video is him reading a discarded Metro (good to see Metros get left on the seat everywhere). The back page features Lewis Hamilton toasting a win from the 2007 season, when his McLaren team-mate was Fernando Alonso. The resultant disgust of The Stig allowed another possible true identity of him to emerge, that of Alonso, which is the basis of that video.
That video was actually quite popular when it was first uploaded, gaining well over 500,000 views before Cogan deleted it (arsehole). The 2nd incarnation isn't nearly as popular, but the message was the same. Fernando Alonso could quite possibly be The Stig. It's very unlikely, but he could be. There was more basis to the argument, but that video was the main basis of the argument.
Today of course, that all changed. Confidentiality agreements be damned, The Stig was writing his autobiography, and he'd be mentioning the whole Stig business regardless, seeing as no-one would buy his poxy book otherwise. He and HarperCollins, the scumbags printing this book won their court case today, and the book will now go to print. I can see the chapter list already:
1. Early life p3
2. Stunts p8
3. Formula 3 and subsequent failure to do well in p15
4. The Stig p16
5. The Future p300
6. Thanks p300
The previous Stig was a man by the name of Perry McCarthy, who also decided to cash in on something which could have been brilliant by writing an autobiography that no-one bought. He was killed off. This should make Top Gear's next series at the end of the year interesting. Do they bring in a new Stig? This would leave much of the power lap times board redundant, so keeping Collins as the Stig would make more sense. The inherent problem with this is of course that the whole character of the Stig as an anonymous, probably insane but very talented racing driver is now shattered, leaving nothing but a very petty man who wanted to cash it in.
In my opinion, Top Gear is nearing the end of its current life cycle. it looked to have perked up a while ago, but the last series showed why it should be getting the heave. Aside from Jeremy Clarkson looking very, very grey, the programme's not funny any more. There's no humour which doesn't involve the obvious being pointed out in unfunny ways, and there's very little in the way of it feeling natural. It's too staged, it's not like the old days when you could watch a challenge like the buy a Porsche for less than £1,500 and think "hey, if me and my mates did that, it'd be the same!" Now, you get stuff like the old British sports cars challenges which aired in the last series, and you think ".... you're trying too hard. This isn't funny." On that note, it seems like it would've made sense for Ben Collins to wait until Top Gear in its current format ended, as it inevitably will do. There would still have been something of a furore over his book, but there wouldn't have been nearly as big a one as the one that ended today.
In reality, he didn't. I shall leave the last word to Top Gear producer Andy Wilman, who posted this on the topgear website last Friday, and say that I agree 100%.
"...but the fact is, the ramshackle, dysfunctional family that is the Top Gear team, from the newest runner right up to Jeremy, Richard and James, has worked bloody hard for many years to make the Stig something worth caring about, and that includes protecting it from a bunch of chancers."
=============================================
I used stuff from here: http://transmission.blogs.topgear.com/2010/08/27/the-stig-he-is-ours/
The above video contains an extremely bad rip of an episode of Top Gear, in which the 4 presenters raced against each other to find the quickest way from one side of London to the other. The Stig, the until recently anonymous driver for the programme, used public transport, and what you see in the video is him reading a discarded Metro (good to see Metros get left on the seat everywhere). The back page features Lewis Hamilton toasting a win from the 2007 season, when his McLaren team-mate was Fernando Alonso. The resultant disgust of The Stig allowed another possible true identity of him to emerge, that of Alonso, which is the basis of that video.
That video was actually quite popular when it was first uploaded, gaining well over 500,000 views before Cogan deleted it (arsehole). The 2nd incarnation isn't nearly as popular, but the message was the same. Fernando Alonso could quite possibly be The Stig. It's very unlikely, but he could be. There was more basis to the argument, but that video was the main basis of the argument.
Today of course, that all changed. Confidentiality agreements be damned, The Stig was writing his autobiography, and he'd be mentioning the whole Stig business regardless, seeing as no-one would buy his poxy book otherwise. He and HarperCollins, the scumbags printing this book won their court case today, and the book will now go to print. I can see the chapter list already:
1. Early life p3
2. Stunts p8
3. Formula 3 and subsequent failure to do well in p15
4. The Stig p16
5. The Future p300
6. Thanks p300
The previous Stig was a man by the name of Perry McCarthy, who also decided to cash in on something which could have been brilliant by writing an autobiography that no-one bought. He was killed off. This should make Top Gear's next series at the end of the year interesting. Do they bring in a new Stig? This would leave much of the power lap times board redundant, so keeping Collins as the Stig would make more sense. The inherent problem with this is of course that the whole character of the Stig as an anonymous, probably insane but very talented racing driver is now shattered, leaving nothing but a very petty man who wanted to cash it in.
In my opinion, Top Gear is nearing the end of its current life cycle. it looked to have perked up a while ago, but the last series showed why it should be getting the heave. Aside from Jeremy Clarkson looking very, very grey, the programme's not funny any more. There's no humour which doesn't involve the obvious being pointed out in unfunny ways, and there's very little in the way of it feeling natural. It's too staged, it's not like the old days when you could watch a challenge like the buy a Porsche for less than £1,500 and think "hey, if me and my mates did that, it'd be the same!" Now, you get stuff like the old British sports cars challenges which aired in the last series, and you think ".... you're trying too hard. This isn't funny." On that note, it seems like it would've made sense for Ben Collins to wait until Top Gear in its current format ended, as it inevitably will do. There would still have been something of a furore over his book, but there wouldn't have been nearly as big a one as the one that ended today.
In reality, he didn't. I shall leave the last word to Top Gear producer Andy Wilman, who posted this on the topgear website last Friday, and say that I agree 100%.
"...but the fact is, the ramshackle, dysfunctional family that is the Top Gear team, from the newest runner right up to Jeremy, Richard and James, has worked bloody hard for many years to make the Stig something worth caring about, and that includes protecting it from a bunch of chancers."
=============================================
I used stuff from here: http://transmission.blogs.topgear.com/2010/08/27/the-stig-he-is-ours/
Monday, 30 August 2010
HERE COMES THE FLASHOVERRRRRRRRRRRRR
Surfing the Void - Klaxons - Album Review
Apperances can be deceiving. As I said not so long ago in this blog (when I was complaing about The Strokes being over-rated), the last decade saw the emergence of shite indie, made by scruffy looking sorts who play boring music and need a good scrub. One such band, on appearance, was Klaxons, who the NME started wanking furiously over when they burst on to the scene in 2007. Klaxons went slightly beyond the boring blueprint that was circulating at that time, adding an edgier electronic sound to their music, labelled by many as "New Rave." This difference in what they got described as somehow managed to give them less credability however, and it seems to be to their benefit that they no longer use it as an adjective for their music. Certainly, the fact that they've grown out of sounding like music made by 14 year olds that think they're cool because they watch Skins helps this.
While the aforementioned NME jizzfest certainly included elements of Rave, the follow-up holds back on them slightly.There's an edgier sound present, which isn't in fact what they had originally created. They were made to re-record parts of it, as their label deemed it "too experimental." When you consider one such song was called "Marble Fields and the Hydrolight Head of Delusion," you can see why. You can be thankful for it as well, as rather than do what MGMT did earlier this year and create something that sounds like Stonehenge by Spinal Tap, Klaxons have produced an album that you can actually listen to without being stoned out of your tits.
It's a fairly short album at 38 minutes, and it does suffer from this as you're listening to it. It creates a certain feel of the album being rushed, as if the band want it to be over and done with before it even gets into any sort of rhythm. As a result of this, while there are very good songs present, when you go from the slower Twin Flames to the utterly deranged yet brilliant Flashover, you get no feeling of continuity. It doesn't feel like an album, and for that it's poorer. The only saving grace for it is that the songs are very good, so you'll want to play it over and over to actually get a feel for them. At least it doesn't suffer from the same problem as Myths of the Near Future, where you had the best song by a mile opening then have a closer that had a hidden track present after a full 15 minutes of silence.
All in all, Surfing the Void is better than I thought it'd be. And aside from the moments of brilliance that are present in the likes of Echoes, Flashover and Valley of the Calm Trees, Surfing the Void is definately in the running for album art of the year. That and i'm hating their image less and less each time, so it can't be that bad.
====================
Tomorrow, you'll get The Illusion of Safety by The Hoosiers
Apperances can be deceiving. As I said not so long ago in this blog (when I was complaing about The Strokes being over-rated), the last decade saw the emergence of shite indie, made by scruffy looking sorts who play boring music and need a good scrub. One such band, on appearance, was Klaxons, who the NME started wanking furiously over when they burst on to the scene in 2007. Klaxons went slightly beyond the boring blueprint that was circulating at that time, adding an edgier electronic sound to their music, labelled by many as "New Rave." This difference in what they got described as somehow managed to give them less credability however, and it seems to be to their benefit that they no longer use it as an adjective for their music. Certainly, the fact that they've grown out of sounding like music made by 14 year olds that think they're cool because they watch Skins helps this.
While the aforementioned NME jizzfest certainly included elements of Rave, the follow-up holds back on them slightly.There's an edgier sound present, which isn't in fact what they had originally created. They were made to re-record parts of it, as their label deemed it "too experimental." When you consider one such song was called "Marble Fields and the Hydrolight Head of Delusion," you can see why. You can be thankful for it as well, as rather than do what MGMT did earlier this year and create something that sounds like Stonehenge by Spinal Tap, Klaxons have produced an album that you can actually listen to without being stoned out of your tits.
It's a fairly short album at 38 minutes, and it does suffer from this as you're listening to it. It creates a certain feel of the album being rushed, as if the band want it to be over and done with before it even gets into any sort of rhythm. As a result of this, while there are very good songs present, when you go from the slower Twin Flames to the utterly deranged yet brilliant Flashover, you get no feeling of continuity. It doesn't feel like an album, and for that it's poorer. The only saving grace for it is that the songs are very good, so you'll want to play it over and over to actually get a feel for them. At least it doesn't suffer from the same problem as Myths of the Near Future, where you had the best song by a mile opening then have a closer that had a hidden track present after a full 15 minutes of silence.
All in all, Surfing the Void is better than I thought it'd be. And aside from the moments of brilliance that are present in the likes of Echoes, Flashover and Valley of the Calm Trees, Surfing the Void is definately in the running for album art of the year. That and i'm hating their image less and less each time, so it can't be that bad.
====================
Tomorrow, you'll get The Illusion of Safety by The Hoosiers
Sunday, 29 August 2010
No Need to Be Frightened Any More
The Winter of Mixed Drinks - Frightened Rabbit - Album Review
A band which up until July had completely escaped by knowledge, Frightened Rabbit have apparently been going for a while. Even more irritating is the fact that they're Scottish, and really good, a type of band I usually champion. Still, you always have to start somewhere, and my introduction to them was at T in the Park, where I caught a glimpse of them whilst waiting for We Are Scientists. I was taken aback by the reception they got (ironically, I had the same feeling when We Are Scientists came on), and as such left, as I felt too weird in amongst people who were quite clearly mad about the band on stage (who were very good, if I remember right).
Since then, I quite annoyingly started at the end buying their most recent album, March's The Winter of Mixed Drinks. I'm quite glad I did, as it's a contender for AOTY, a voyage of self-discovery and recovery from a bad bad woman. It's quite heartwarming to see a subject like that written about properly in this age of five-pieces composed of scrawny teenagers with identical haircuts (coughyoumeatsixcough). For every song that explores the depressing bottom of human emotion (Things, The Loneliness and the Scream) there's a counterpart going in the opposite direction (Nothing Like You, Not Miserable). When you lace the kind of outpourings present here with beautifully crafted melodies and exquiste songcraft, you get 10 tracks that all have a certain quality about them, coming across as both polished yet still harnessing the raw emotion that's been put into creating them. It doesn't do any harm either when you consider that each song is extremely catchy and sticks in your head for days on end.
As this is the first album by Frightened Rabbit i've heard, I can't comment on how they've progressed since previous work. Whatever they've been through in their previous efforts, they've certainly reached a comfortable and accomplished point with TWOMN, their 3rd. Hopefully, it'll serve as a platform to get them the greater recognition and praise that they certainly deserve.
======================================
This was too short, but there'll be another review tomorrow, of Surfing the Void by Klaxons.
A band which up until July had completely escaped by knowledge, Frightened Rabbit have apparently been going for a while. Even more irritating is the fact that they're Scottish, and really good, a type of band I usually champion. Still, you always have to start somewhere, and my introduction to them was at T in the Park, where I caught a glimpse of them whilst waiting for We Are Scientists. I was taken aback by the reception they got (ironically, I had the same feeling when We Are Scientists came on), and as such left, as I felt too weird in amongst people who were quite clearly mad about the band on stage (who were very good, if I remember right).
Since then, I quite annoyingly started at the end buying their most recent album, March's The Winter of Mixed Drinks. I'm quite glad I did, as it's a contender for AOTY, a voyage of self-discovery and recovery from a bad bad woman. It's quite heartwarming to see a subject like that written about properly in this age of five-pieces composed of scrawny teenagers with identical haircuts (coughyoumeatsixcough). For every song that explores the depressing bottom of human emotion (Things, The Loneliness and the Scream) there's a counterpart going in the opposite direction (Nothing Like You, Not Miserable). When you lace the kind of outpourings present here with beautifully crafted melodies and exquiste songcraft, you get 10 tracks that all have a certain quality about them, coming across as both polished yet still harnessing the raw emotion that's been put into creating them. It doesn't do any harm either when you consider that each song is extremely catchy and sticks in your head for days on end.
As this is the first album by Frightened Rabbit i've heard, I can't comment on how they've progressed since previous work. Whatever they've been through in their previous efforts, they've certainly reached a comfortable and accomplished point with TWOMN, their 3rd. Hopefully, it'll serve as a platform to get them the greater recognition and praise that they certainly deserve.
======================================
This was too short, but there'll be another review tomorrow, of Surfing the Void by Klaxons.
Sunday, 15 August 2010
Is This It?
Is This It - The Strokes - Album Review
Released in 2001, Is This It heralded the arrival of one of the most important bands of the decade, The Strokes. An album met with fawning from all quarters of the media, even being named album of the decade by the NME (it wasn't). Everyone else loved it too, it was named by many as the best album of the year (it wasn't), and described as one of the most important guitar band albums in years.
Despite this, The Strokes have never been a band that ever struck me as anything special. Boring music, boring singing and not the most unique band in the world, although to be fair to them, they did influence all of the tuneless indie that followed it in the last decade (and which saturated the market to such a point it all became completely identical and worthless). But, as there's nothing out this week, and since I told Harry i'd do it two months ago, i've thrown together what I feel about their debut album that spawned a decade of clones.
Remember last week's review of The Suburbs by Arcade Fire, and how I mentioned that despite it being over an hour long, you would never know this whilst listening to it? Is This It manages to go in completely the opposite direction, by being very short (11 songs, ranging from 2 and a half minutes to 3 minutes 58) and feeling like it'll never end. This is facilitated mainly by the fact that each songs sounds exactly the same, which is hardly surprising when you consider the genre it belongs to. I wanted to hate this album when I first listened to it and at first, I didn't. The second track, The Modern Age, is probably the best thing here, even if it only managed to achieve this by outshining other songs which aren't exactly the greatest pieces of musical composition ever.
If you've never heard The Strokes barring the riff for Reptilia in a telly show somewhere, or the intro to Last Nite which has been subsequently ripped off more times than anyone who travels by First Bus, then Is This It (and probably anything else they've ever done) can be summarised in three words:
1. Jangling. The guitar sounds like it's being played by Muhammad Ali in an earthquake, and this offers nothing to make the record memorable.
2. Drawling. Before I heard this, I thought the chap singing had an unintelligble voice. Now however, I realise that this cannot actually be the case, because for someone to have a voice that sounds like he's got a doormat clamped over his face requires either a deranged gibbon at the mixing desk, or him to have smoked a pile of Marlboro's that would put both the Cigarette Smoking Man from The X Files and the smokers from Chewin the Fat to shame. While there are a select few vocalists who can sing words you can't make out and remain palatable, Julian (i'm not trying to spell his surname) just bores you to tears, and makes you wish you could at least see him singing in person to see if this voice is real.
3. What? Beautifully applicable because i've had this album on a good few times this week to try and make any of it stand out for praise, and I can't. The only thing I can remember is the song already mentioned. The rest of the album is a complete blur, passing by in the manner of a condescending flick of the head, from someone with a woman's hair cut, a coat with an upturned collar and woman's jeans. The album reeks of the horrible indie subculture which arose in the 00's, and which I once considered myself to be a part of.
Is This It was released in 2001. Now, from 2001 to 2005 (the year I started buying music) I have 31 albums that fall into that timespace, so i'm not the most qualified to comment on how this album influenced music in that timescale, but after that, there are countless bands who fit the same cookie cutter mould that The Strokes seem to have pioneered, and the one that seems to have come closest to them and had the most prominence are Arctic Monkeys. Is that an achievement? That this album spawned a decade of utter shite from little jumped up twerps with hairstyles and regional singing voices? That's probably why I hate this album and band. That they were responsible for the only decent thing the music buying (moving in to ripping-off) public listened to, which could only be called decent because of the manufactured tripe it was up against. What a shame. Even with Is This It's legacy (which it doesn't deserve), I can't see what all the fuss is about.
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Next week.... christ knows. If you want anything, give me a shout. And I started to ramble this week, my apologies.
Released in 2001, Is This It heralded the arrival of one of the most important bands of the decade, The Strokes. An album met with fawning from all quarters of the media, even being named album of the decade by the NME (it wasn't). Everyone else loved it too, it was named by many as the best album of the year (it wasn't), and described as one of the most important guitar band albums in years.
Despite this, The Strokes have never been a band that ever struck me as anything special. Boring music, boring singing and not the most unique band in the world, although to be fair to them, they did influence all of the tuneless indie that followed it in the last decade (and which saturated the market to such a point it all became completely identical and worthless). But, as there's nothing out this week, and since I told Harry i'd do it two months ago, i've thrown together what I feel about their debut album that spawned a decade of clones.
Remember last week's review of The Suburbs by Arcade Fire, and how I mentioned that despite it being over an hour long, you would never know this whilst listening to it? Is This It manages to go in completely the opposite direction, by being very short (11 songs, ranging from 2 and a half minutes to 3 minutes 58) and feeling like it'll never end. This is facilitated mainly by the fact that each songs sounds exactly the same, which is hardly surprising when you consider the genre it belongs to. I wanted to hate this album when I first listened to it and at first, I didn't. The second track, The Modern Age, is probably the best thing here, even if it only managed to achieve this by outshining other songs which aren't exactly the greatest pieces of musical composition ever.
If you've never heard The Strokes barring the riff for Reptilia in a telly show somewhere, or the intro to Last Nite which has been subsequently ripped off more times than anyone who travels by First Bus, then Is This It (and probably anything else they've ever done) can be summarised in three words:
1. Jangling. The guitar sounds like it's being played by Muhammad Ali in an earthquake, and this offers nothing to make the record memorable.
2. Drawling. Before I heard this, I thought the chap singing had an unintelligble voice. Now however, I realise that this cannot actually be the case, because for someone to have a voice that sounds like he's got a doormat clamped over his face requires either a deranged gibbon at the mixing desk, or him to have smoked a pile of Marlboro's that would put both the Cigarette Smoking Man from The X Files and the smokers from Chewin the Fat to shame. While there are a select few vocalists who can sing words you can't make out and remain palatable, Julian (i'm not trying to spell his surname) just bores you to tears, and makes you wish you could at least see him singing in person to see if this voice is real.
3. What? Beautifully applicable because i've had this album on a good few times this week to try and make any of it stand out for praise, and I can't. The only thing I can remember is the song already mentioned. The rest of the album is a complete blur, passing by in the manner of a condescending flick of the head, from someone with a woman's hair cut, a coat with an upturned collar and woman's jeans. The album reeks of the horrible indie subculture which arose in the 00's, and which I once considered myself to be a part of.
Is This It was released in 2001. Now, from 2001 to 2005 (the year I started buying music) I have 31 albums that fall into that timespace, so i'm not the most qualified to comment on how this album influenced music in that timescale, but after that, there are countless bands who fit the same cookie cutter mould that The Strokes seem to have pioneered, and the one that seems to have come closest to them and had the most prominence are Arctic Monkeys. Is that an achievement? That this album spawned a decade of utter shite from little jumped up twerps with hairstyles and regional singing voices? That's probably why I hate this album and band. That they were responsible for the only decent thing the music buying (moving in to ripping-off) public listened to, which could only be called decent because of the manufactured tripe it was up against. What a shame. Even with Is This It's legacy (which it doesn't deserve), I can't see what all the fuss is about.
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Next week.... christ knows. If you want anything, give me a shout. And I started to ramble this week, my apologies.
Tuesday, 10 August 2010
For French-Canadians, It's Not That Bad
The Suburbs - Arcade Fire - Album Review
Few records that i've ever bought have ever been put on and immediately left me thinking "that meant something." You know what I mean, the kind of music that makes you sit up (if you weren't sitting up already) and take note of what you're listening to, the message being put across by the artist. Even as time goes on and music evolves (or goes backwards on the evolutionary scale, depending on how you look at it), there are few bands left that can actually do this. As it turns out, Arcade Fire are one of them. Although i've still not heard Funeral, by all accounts it's fantastic and showed a glimpse of what they could be capable of. Neon Bible came next, and while there were flashes of brilliance, plodding stuff like the title track and anything that had French in it completely ruined any hope of it being the complete record many made it out to be. So, what was to be the case with album #3?
As I have matured since I first started listening to music (seriously, never do critical evaluations of albums, it ruins your ability to enjoy music), I can put an album on and generally, take everything in after about 3 listens. I make a conscious effort to know what i'm listening to and enjoy it, and after that, I go deeper. I listen to the words, to the way the album is structured and the music that's being used to create the sound that eventually gets out to the buying public. With The Suburbs, each of these steps takes longer. Aside from the fact that it's over an hour long and has 15 (real) tracks, each of these is so dense, so perfectly crafted that you have to take longer to fully appreciate it. Each song is a work of perfection, and each song actually feels like the band cared about it, and put all their efforts into making it the best piece of work possible from them, which is rare in music today.
The real ace up the sleeve for The Suburbs is how you don't realise where time goes whilst it's on. Coming in at over 64 minutes long, you would be forgiven for thinking you're in for a slog when you first put it on. Fortunately you're not however, as from the fairly low-key opening title track rolling into Ready to Start, the best song on the album, it never lets up. The two part songs, Half Light and Sprawl add some beautiful structure to the full record, and help to keep the lull in the middle from Deep Blue (a song about the chess playing computer of the same name) and current single (why?) We Used to Wait from causing the record to stop. It's in these two parters where the comments of frontman Win Butler were explained, when he said The Suburbs sounded "like Depeche Mode meets Neil Young." It's a marriage that sould have been made sooner, judging from the results. Empty Room and Month of May especially however sound like they're channeling The Clash, and this is just another sound that Arcade Fire pull off like they've been doing it their whole life.
As far as lyrics go, The Suburbs is mainly a criticism of the way the world is now. 3 years have passed since Neon Bible's release in 2007, and the world has turned to pot. Win Butler (and his wife/daughter/nieces/whichever burds do backing vocals) muses about the problems in the world throughout, and while there are times when it can sound a bit too bitter, and a bit too whiny, it all hits home perfectly. The Suburbs has fulfilled the vision that Neon Bible set out to start, something that completely reflects the environment it was born in and combines biting critcism with expert song writing. Just about every song is about some topic of the harshness of the world as it is today, and it could be argued that The Suburbs is the first observant record since This is a Fix by The Automatic, or Glasvegas' eponymous drbut effort. Certainly, it's the most important record you're likely to buy this year, and could well be the best.
============================
Next week: Harry Gover's moaning shall subside, as I listen to what the NME thinks is the best album of the last decade. That should be fun.
Few records that i've ever bought have ever been put on and immediately left me thinking "that meant something." You know what I mean, the kind of music that makes you sit up (if you weren't sitting up already) and take note of what you're listening to, the message being put across by the artist. Even as time goes on and music evolves (or goes backwards on the evolutionary scale, depending on how you look at it), there are few bands left that can actually do this. As it turns out, Arcade Fire are one of them. Although i've still not heard Funeral, by all accounts it's fantastic and showed a glimpse of what they could be capable of. Neon Bible came next, and while there were flashes of brilliance, plodding stuff like the title track and anything that had French in it completely ruined any hope of it being the complete record many made it out to be. So, what was to be the case with album #3?
As I have matured since I first started listening to music (seriously, never do critical evaluations of albums, it ruins your ability to enjoy music), I can put an album on and generally, take everything in after about 3 listens. I make a conscious effort to know what i'm listening to and enjoy it, and after that, I go deeper. I listen to the words, to the way the album is structured and the music that's being used to create the sound that eventually gets out to the buying public. With The Suburbs, each of these steps takes longer. Aside from the fact that it's over an hour long and has 15 (real) tracks, each of these is so dense, so perfectly crafted that you have to take longer to fully appreciate it. Each song is a work of perfection, and each song actually feels like the band cared about it, and put all their efforts into making it the best piece of work possible from them, which is rare in music today.
The real ace up the sleeve for The Suburbs is how you don't realise where time goes whilst it's on. Coming in at over 64 minutes long, you would be forgiven for thinking you're in for a slog when you first put it on. Fortunately you're not however, as from the fairly low-key opening title track rolling into Ready to Start, the best song on the album, it never lets up. The two part songs, Half Light and Sprawl add some beautiful structure to the full record, and help to keep the lull in the middle from Deep Blue (a song about the chess playing computer of the same name) and current single (why?) We Used to Wait from causing the record to stop. It's in these two parters where the comments of frontman Win Butler were explained, when he said The Suburbs sounded "like Depeche Mode meets Neil Young." It's a marriage that sould have been made sooner, judging from the results. Empty Room and Month of May especially however sound like they're channeling The Clash, and this is just another sound that Arcade Fire pull off like they've been doing it their whole life.
As far as lyrics go, The Suburbs is mainly a criticism of the way the world is now. 3 years have passed since Neon Bible's release in 2007, and the world has turned to pot. Win Butler (and his wife/daughter/nieces/whichever burds do backing vocals) muses about the problems in the world throughout, and while there are times when it can sound a bit too bitter, and a bit too whiny, it all hits home perfectly. The Suburbs has fulfilled the vision that Neon Bible set out to start, something that completely reflects the environment it was born in and combines biting critcism with expert song writing. Just about every song is about some topic of the harshness of the world as it is today, and it could be argued that The Suburbs is the first observant record since This is a Fix by The Automatic, or Glasvegas' eponymous drbut effort. Certainly, it's the most important record you're likely to buy this year, and could well be the best.
============================
Next week: Harry Gover's moaning shall subside, as I listen to what the NME thinks is the best album of the last decade. That should be fun.
Sunday, 1 August 2010
I'd Quite Like to Runaway...
The Runaway - The Magic Numbers - Album Review
I remember when I first played The Magic Numbers (by that I mean their first album). I remember where I bought it as well, and I can remember times afterwards when I had it on or had certain songs on. Not least because Forever Lost is in an episode of Scrubs, but aside from that, it was a really good album, under-rated when it came out and still to this day. When next album Those the Brokes was released just a year later and managed to be better and catchier, you knew that this band was on to something.
So, where to with album #3? TTB implied that the band were going for a more mainstream yet still palatable sound, one which would get them the recognition that they deserved but whilst still retaining the base of their sound, charming guitar melodies with two singing voices which compliment each other perfectly, which isn't bad considering they're of opposite gender. Both Romeo Stodart and Angela Gannon's voices manage to take some of the darkest material that can go into songs (especially on The Runaway) and make it sound beautiful. The Runaway utilises both of their voices to perfection and to be frank, it has to. That they both seem to believe what they're singing about feels like the only reason to carry on listening to most of this album, which is a real shame, given what they've shown they were capable of. Some of the songs seem to be better suited to read as poems, the emotions you can feel from reading them don't seem to come across when you hear them played.
From lead single and lead song The Pulse, you knew that this album was going to be more low-tempo than the others were. What you didn't know was just how drastic a departure it would be, as after listening to this album, I honestly can't pick out any great moments. There are brief flashes of brilliance, The Pulse is probably the best example of the albums work, and Throwing My Heart Away provides a pretty strong reason for Angela Gannon to take lead vocals, but that's about it. It's all very lovely to listen to, but unless you're the kind of person who live in a constant state of serenity, then I can't think of a reason to keep listening to this. It sounds like the kind of bland, innocuous songs you get as hold music when you phone up some obscure government office. That or the kind of thing that gets played in dentists room's where you still sit in a wooden chair (I don't have to worry about this, my dentist's a child of the 80's, he had INXS on
the last time I was there).
The Magic Numbers are a band I have always championed. Despite never having any huge popularity, they still have a strong fanbase, mainly comprised of people who can listen to albums in full and appreciate the fact that all members of bands should play an instrument, apart from a lead singer. I always thought that if they kept building on the material that was in their first two albums, they could eventually get the success that they seemed to warrant. With The Runaway however, i'm unsure. Is this just a difficult third album, or is it the beginning of a fade into an obscurity that Snow Patrol circa 2002 would be ashamed of? I hope that there's another album in 2011, which gets back to showcasing what The Magic Numbers are really able to do.
Oh, and there's a bonus track from the soundtrack to one of those gay Twilight films. For shame, I sincerely hope that the record company made them do that, and it wasn't their choice.
=========================
Next Week, The Suburbs, by Arcade Fire. I really feel I should listen to Funeral before that, but we'll see what happens
I remember when I first played The Magic Numbers (by that I mean their first album). I remember where I bought it as well, and I can remember times afterwards when I had it on or had certain songs on. Not least because Forever Lost is in an episode of Scrubs, but aside from that, it was a really good album, under-rated when it came out and still to this day. When next album Those the Brokes was released just a year later and managed to be better and catchier, you knew that this band was on to something.
So, where to with album #3? TTB implied that the band were going for a more mainstream yet still palatable sound, one which would get them the recognition that they deserved but whilst still retaining the base of their sound, charming guitar melodies with two singing voices which compliment each other perfectly, which isn't bad considering they're of opposite gender. Both Romeo Stodart and Angela Gannon's voices manage to take some of the darkest material that can go into songs (especially on The Runaway) and make it sound beautiful. The Runaway utilises both of their voices to perfection and to be frank, it has to. That they both seem to believe what they're singing about feels like the only reason to carry on listening to most of this album, which is a real shame, given what they've shown they were capable of. Some of the songs seem to be better suited to read as poems, the emotions you can feel from reading them don't seem to come across when you hear them played.
From lead single and lead song The Pulse, you knew that this album was going to be more low-tempo than the others were. What you didn't know was just how drastic a departure it would be, as after listening to this album, I honestly can't pick out any great moments. There are brief flashes of brilliance, The Pulse is probably the best example of the albums work, and Throwing My Heart Away provides a pretty strong reason for Angela Gannon to take lead vocals, but that's about it. It's all very lovely to listen to, but unless you're the kind of person who live in a constant state of serenity, then I can't think of a reason to keep listening to this. It sounds like the kind of bland, innocuous songs you get as hold music when you phone up some obscure government office. That or the kind of thing that gets played in dentists room's where you still sit in a wooden chair (I don't have to worry about this, my dentist's a child of the 80's, he had INXS on
the last time I was there).
The Magic Numbers are a band I have always championed. Despite never having any huge popularity, they still have a strong fanbase, mainly comprised of people who can listen to albums in full and appreciate the fact that all members of bands should play an instrument, apart from a lead singer. I always thought that if they kept building on the material that was in their first two albums, they could eventually get the success that they seemed to warrant. With The Runaway however, i'm unsure. Is this just a difficult third album, or is it the beginning of a fade into an obscurity that Snow Patrol circa 2002 would be ashamed of? I hope that there's another album in 2011, which gets back to showcasing what The Magic Numbers are really able to do.
Oh, and there's a bonus track from the soundtrack to one of those gay Twilight films. For shame, I sincerely hope that the record company made them do that, and it wasn't their choice.
=========================
Next Week, The Suburbs, by Arcade Fire. I really feel I should listen to Funeral before that, but we'll see what happens
Thursday, 15 July 2010
Things I Have an Opinion On #23
The series of PS2 Collections for the PS3 system
Released in April to a fanfare that normally accompanies a French military victory, the God of War Collection for the PlayStation 3 was a single blu-ray disc which comprised the two PlayStation 2 games, God of War and God of War 2. While this may be seen as simply a way for Sony and the respective developers to make in money whilst putting out no new content, the idea is absolute genius. I came up with it years ago, and it amazes me that no-one at developers who had popular PS2 games did either. I have never played a GoW game, but i'll be picking the Collection up when I can find a copy of it, and enjoying it. That's what makes this very simple idea so brilliant. Not only does it allow people who had these games to experience them again in HD (and 3D, if you're the kind of person who loses thread of a conversation when as bird flies past), but it allows people like me to experience what's constantly described as one of the best series in gaming. Lord knows it's been ripped off by enough other games to warrant that tag.
Gamers like me have jumped at this idea, and the mounds of suggestions from the PS2's substantial (and still growing) back catalogue have bombarded gaming sites all over the internet. Happily, the Sly Cooper collection will be coming to us in November. One of the lesser-known brilliant games from the 6th generation, this Collection will allow the few geeks like me who know what it is to re-live their childhood, and allow others to hopefully be captivated by its magic.
What follows is a list of the series I deem worthy of getting the PS3 gloss:
Jak and Daxter trilogy
And the trilogy only. None of the Crash Bandicoot ripping off where you put the chracters in go-karts, although if Daxter and The Lost Frontier are included as well, I wont mind too much. One of the top 3 series that Sony posesses, i'm amazed that these games haven't been made already. Regular readers (if they exist) will remember that Jak II was my 3rd best game of the last decade, and the lowest any placed was the original in 13th. The series has had plaudits thrown at it from all angles, and it certainly sold enough copies on the PS2 to be worthy of a re-make. It will also allow me to use my Jak II strategy guide again!
Team Ico (Ico/Shadow of the Colossus)
While The Last Guardian is coming to us.... soon, the games which Team Ico has given us are cult classics already. I never played either of them, so that's why I want them back. Both are considered brilliant if unconventional, and they seem to be the most requested games to get the shiny put over them.
Grand Theft Auto
I never played any of the old ones, and I want to.
I'm done now. I realise that the substantial....-ness of this post has rather vanished, but all I really wanted to do was applaud Sony (shock!) for what they're doing with the Collections, even if it is essentially proving that creativity int he gaming industry seems to be banned. Keep it up, and let me play Jak and Daxter again.
Released in April to a fanfare that normally accompanies a French military victory, the God of War Collection for the PlayStation 3 was a single blu-ray disc which comprised the two PlayStation 2 games, God of War and God of War 2. While this may be seen as simply a way for Sony and the respective developers to make in money whilst putting out no new content, the idea is absolute genius. I came up with it years ago, and it amazes me that no-one at developers who had popular PS2 games did either. I have never played a GoW game, but i'll be picking the Collection up when I can find a copy of it, and enjoying it. That's what makes this very simple idea so brilliant. Not only does it allow people who had these games to experience them again in HD (and 3D, if you're the kind of person who loses thread of a conversation when as bird flies past), but it allows people like me to experience what's constantly described as one of the best series in gaming. Lord knows it's been ripped off by enough other games to warrant that tag.
Gamers like me have jumped at this idea, and the mounds of suggestions from the PS2's substantial (and still growing) back catalogue have bombarded gaming sites all over the internet. Happily, the Sly Cooper collection will be coming to us in November. One of the lesser-known brilliant games from the 6th generation, this Collection will allow the few geeks like me who know what it is to re-live their childhood, and allow others to hopefully be captivated by its magic.
What follows is a list of the series I deem worthy of getting the PS3 gloss:
Jak and Daxter trilogy
And the trilogy only. None of the Crash Bandicoot ripping off where you put the chracters in go-karts, although if Daxter and The Lost Frontier are included as well, I wont mind too much. One of the top 3 series that Sony posesses, i'm amazed that these games haven't been made already. Regular readers (if they exist) will remember that Jak II was my 3rd best game of the last decade, and the lowest any placed was the original in 13th. The series has had plaudits thrown at it from all angles, and it certainly sold enough copies on the PS2 to be worthy of a re-make. It will also allow me to use my Jak II strategy guide again!
Team Ico (Ico/Shadow of the Colossus)
While The Last Guardian is coming to us.... soon, the games which Team Ico has given us are cult classics already. I never played either of them, so that's why I want them back. Both are considered brilliant if unconventional, and they seem to be the most requested games to get the shiny put over them.
Grand Theft Auto
I never played any of the old ones, and I want to.
I'm done now. I realise that the substantial....-ness of this post has rather vanished, but all I really wanted to do was applaud Sony (shock!) for what they're doing with the Collections, even if it is essentially proving that creativity int he gaming industry seems to be banned. Keep it up, and let me play Jak and Daxter again.
Tuesday, 13 July 2010
Things I Have an Opinion On #22
T in the Park 2010 (now that i've been)
Before I left for an old field in Kinross the other day, I posted the bands I wanted to see, and what songs I wanted to play. Out of all the bands I posted. I saw all but two, and I saw some I never had listed. Not all of the songs I posted were played unfortunately, but there were certainly plenty of others to make up for it.
Friday
Everything Everything
A band we went to see because nobody else was on, described in the programme as " a mix between the Beach Boys and the Futureheads." Neither of these were apparent, and the band weren't wonderful. The drummer carried them, and when you hear lines like "who's going to sit on your face when i'm gone?" you know that things can only get better. I'd still listen to them more though, they weren't that awful.
Chapel Club
A band the programme described as "Editors crossed with White Lies," Chapel Club were a pleasant surprise. The comparions to other post punk revival bands were very clear, and they were quite surprising. The drummer looked petrified however.
Delphic
A ten minute delay coming out didn't stop Delphic from fulfilling my prediction of them being one of the best bands there. The Red Bull Futures tent was just about full, and justafiably so given the atmosphere. The only complaint i'd have is the delay which probably stopped them from playing Submission, but the rest of the performance made up for it. Opening with Doubt and following up with Red Lights, Halcyon, This Momentary, Counterpoint and Acolyte, Delphic made me lose about 5 pounds of body weight in sweat alone. Being right up the front for it helped rather a bit too.
Muse
I was in the golden circle for Muse. I was pushing to the front, and probably got to about 8 people back from the front. Despite this, I left halfway through their set, when the utterly terrible Unnatural Selection was on. By all accounts (Harry Gover's, so its validity could be best described as "cloudy") the atmosphere was better further back, but I couldn't have lasted. I was ready to pass out, and the performance wasn't worth staying for. There were no surprises, no Citizen Erased or Showbiz, just stuff that'll be on the greatest hits album in a few years. There were no surprises, and no real effort made to get the crowd on board with the band. A huge disappointment in my eyes.
Saturday
Twisted Wheel
Shite
Local Natives
"Catch them this weekend before they're massive and remember where you saw them first" boasted the programme, and they were pretty good. Nothing particularly special, but i've a feeling that if i'd known some of their stuff, it would've been more enjoyable.
Newton Faulkner
Despite all of the neds turning up for Dream Catch Me, one of the best atmospheres of the weekend was present at the main stage on Saturday. I spent most of Newtons performance staring at his hands, trying to figure out how he was making the sounds he was. Even though it was one man with an acoustic guitar sitting on a chair, he got right in with the crowd, and comes across as a really nice, genuine guy. Special mention has to be made to the end of Gone in the Morning though, and how he got the crowd going for the last chorus:
"I'm going to give you your motivation. You are pirates.... with rabies. You are 50 feet from shore, where you will meet the barbarian hordes. They are your sworn enemy, and you are hungry for blood. Why? They kissed your mother (cue picture of 50's housewife on-screen with YOUR MUM written above it) That's right, they are a bunch of mother kissers. 40 feet from shore. 30 feet from shore. When you get to the shore, you're going to go absolutely nuts. 20 feet from shore. 10 feet..... 8 FEET...... 6 FEET...... 4 FEET...... 2 FEET........ GO! Crowd: "GONE IN THE MORNING......" and so on. Haunting. And look for the video of him playing Bohemian Rhapsody to close, utterly sublime. All done on acoustic guitar, remember.
The Proclaimers
A band Craig made me go see so he'd go and see Hurts on Sunday (I was right in this, however), they were accomplished, if uninspiring. No real stage presence.
We Are Scientists
The kind of band that tents seem to be made for, We Are Scientists nearly brought it down. Hits such as Nobody Move, Nobody Gets Hurt, It's a Hit and Inaction had the crowd going mental, but The Great Escape topped all of them. After playing the opening chord, everybody goes mad. Once further chords are played, a mosh pit subsequently forms. Fantastic.
Stereophonics
A performance slightly marred by the idiots in the crowd who all turned up to bob one hand in the air for Eminem, this was still a good set. They never played Hurry Up and Wait or Show Me How, but Could You Be The One was there, and all of the other big songs were well recieved. Nothing topped Kelly Jones' signing off however:
"Thanks very much, enjoy Eminem."
*scattered booing from those there with ears*
"Well, if he doesn't turn up, give us a shout and we'll come back out."
Oustanding. My one regret from the weekend (aside from not seeing Biffy play Justboy) was not taking a flag that had "Stereophonics > Eminem" written on it.
Rodrigo Y Gabriella
I only got to catch the end of their set, but when two people with two acoustic guitars and no microphones look like one of the best acts on, you know they've done well. See them if you get the chance.
Kassidy
A band I only went to see because no-one wanted to see Billy Talent, my initial description of "emulsion" was proven accurate. Four talented guys no doubt, but they often seemed to cancel each other out, and were trying way too hard to sound like The Eagles.
Hurts
Despite me actually knowing about them, Hurts were the biggest surprise of the weekend. Looking vaguely like Depeche Mode and sounding like the 80's in a blender, I felt wonderfully smug watching this mob, knowing I was one of the few people at the entire festival who knew anything by them. Composed of a singer who looked like Sheldon out the Big Bang Theory, a guy on drums, a guy on keyboards, a guy on piano and one backing singer, Hurts' live show was captivationg, although mainly for the one guy standing at the back. He looked like he was lost, standing stock still with hands in fists dressed in a tuxedo, not blinking and not moving. The stand out moment of the whole performance was a song which I think was Happiness, where he burst in to full voice and got the loudest cheer of the whole gig. At least, until he bowed when the band were done, I think everyone was just happy he wasn't looking at them any more.
Rise Against
Energetic, but I never knew enough of their stuff to really enjoy. They were still probably better than The View, though.
Jay-Zed
I suffered through him to get a good spot for Kasabian, and he was quite good at what he was doing. I would never value the medium he pedals, but he at least has my respect for being good with the crowd, which he really, really was.
Kasabian
Delayed slightly by Jay-Zed over-running, they certainly made up for it. There was a slight down patch in the middle where they played either a new song or cover that no-one had heard of and some slower songs, but songs like The Doberman, Reason is Treason and Cutt Off certainly made up for it. The encore of Fire, Vlad the Impaler and L.S.F. was also the perfect way to close the night. If you watch the video of Fire, right around the time the first chorus starts is where I get an elbow to the face and lose my glasses. I was a bit pissed, but thankful and surprised that it had taken that long over the weekend. I also never thought I would enjoy getting "I love you fucking Jocks" shouted at me, but Tom Meighan in all his arse-hole-ness pulled it off. Outstanding.
And that was the end. There is patter that will never die, such as "Peter, you're fucking wrecked," calling people a "crank," d'you want a game of basketball ya prick?" and the immortal "RIDDLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!" Fantastic, and the wristband i'm never taking off will be a lasting reminder. All that's left to do is catch up on the telly I missed...
Before I left for an old field in Kinross the other day, I posted the bands I wanted to see, and what songs I wanted to play. Out of all the bands I posted. I saw all but two, and I saw some I never had listed. Not all of the songs I posted were played unfortunately, but there were certainly plenty of others to make up for it.
Friday
Everything Everything
A band we went to see because nobody else was on, described in the programme as " a mix between the Beach Boys and the Futureheads." Neither of these were apparent, and the band weren't wonderful. The drummer carried them, and when you hear lines like "who's going to sit on your face when i'm gone?" you know that things can only get better. I'd still listen to them more though, they weren't that awful.
Chapel Club
A band the programme described as "Editors crossed with White Lies," Chapel Club were a pleasant surprise. The comparions to other post punk revival bands were very clear, and they were quite surprising. The drummer looked petrified however.
Delphic
A ten minute delay coming out didn't stop Delphic from fulfilling my prediction of them being one of the best bands there. The Red Bull Futures tent was just about full, and justafiably so given the atmosphere. The only complaint i'd have is the delay which probably stopped them from playing Submission, but the rest of the performance made up for it. Opening with Doubt and following up with Red Lights, Halcyon, This Momentary, Counterpoint and Acolyte, Delphic made me lose about 5 pounds of body weight in sweat alone. Being right up the front for it helped rather a bit too.
Muse
I was in the golden circle for Muse. I was pushing to the front, and probably got to about 8 people back from the front. Despite this, I left halfway through their set, when the utterly terrible Unnatural Selection was on. By all accounts (Harry Gover's, so its validity could be best described as "cloudy") the atmosphere was better further back, but I couldn't have lasted. I was ready to pass out, and the performance wasn't worth staying for. There were no surprises, no Citizen Erased or Showbiz, just stuff that'll be on the greatest hits album in a few years. There were no surprises, and no real effort made to get the crowd on board with the band. A huge disappointment in my eyes.
Saturday
Twisted Wheel
Shite
Local Natives
"Catch them this weekend before they're massive and remember where you saw them first" boasted the programme, and they were pretty good. Nothing particularly special, but i've a feeling that if i'd known some of their stuff, it would've been more enjoyable.
Newton Faulkner
Despite all of the neds turning up for Dream Catch Me, one of the best atmospheres of the weekend was present at the main stage on Saturday. I spent most of Newtons performance staring at his hands, trying to figure out how he was making the sounds he was. Even though it was one man with an acoustic guitar sitting on a chair, he got right in with the crowd, and comes across as a really nice, genuine guy. Special mention has to be made to the end of Gone in the Morning though, and how he got the crowd going for the last chorus:
"I'm going to give you your motivation. You are pirates.... with rabies. You are 50 feet from shore, where you will meet the barbarian hordes. They are your sworn enemy, and you are hungry for blood. Why? They kissed your mother (cue picture of 50's housewife on-screen with YOUR MUM written above it) That's right, they are a bunch of mother kissers. 40 feet from shore. 30 feet from shore. When you get to the shore, you're going to go absolutely nuts. 20 feet from shore. 10 feet..... 8 FEET...... 6 FEET...... 4 FEET...... 2 FEET........ GO! Crowd: "GONE IN THE MORNING......" and so on. Haunting. And look for the video of him playing Bohemian Rhapsody to close, utterly sublime. All done on acoustic guitar, remember.
The Proclaimers
A band Craig made me go see so he'd go and see Hurts on Sunday (I was right in this, however), they were accomplished, if uninspiring. No real stage presence.
We Are Scientists
The kind of band that tents seem to be made for, We Are Scientists nearly brought it down. Hits such as Nobody Move, Nobody Gets Hurt, It's a Hit and Inaction had the crowd going mental, but The Great Escape topped all of them. After playing the opening chord, everybody goes mad. Once further chords are played, a mosh pit subsequently forms. Fantastic.
Stereophonics
A performance slightly marred by the idiots in the crowd who all turned up to bob one hand in the air for Eminem, this was still a good set. They never played Hurry Up and Wait or Show Me How, but Could You Be The One was there, and all of the other big songs were well recieved. Nothing topped Kelly Jones' signing off however:
"Thanks very much, enjoy Eminem."
*scattered booing from those there with ears*
"Well, if he doesn't turn up, give us a shout and we'll come back out."
Oustanding. My one regret from the weekend (aside from not seeing Biffy play Justboy) was not taking a flag that had "Stereophonics > Eminem" written on it.
Rodrigo Y Gabriella
I only got to catch the end of their set, but when two people with two acoustic guitars and no microphones look like one of the best acts on, you know they've done well. See them if you get the chance.
Kassidy
A band I only went to see because no-one wanted to see Billy Talent, my initial description of "emulsion" was proven accurate. Four talented guys no doubt, but they often seemed to cancel each other out, and were trying way too hard to sound like The Eagles.
Hurts
Despite me actually knowing about them, Hurts were the biggest surprise of the weekend. Looking vaguely like Depeche Mode and sounding like the 80's in a blender, I felt wonderfully smug watching this mob, knowing I was one of the few people at the entire festival who knew anything by them. Composed of a singer who looked like Sheldon out the Big Bang Theory, a guy on drums, a guy on keyboards, a guy on piano and one backing singer, Hurts' live show was captivationg, although mainly for the one guy standing at the back. He looked like he was lost, standing stock still with hands in fists dressed in a tuxedo, not blinking and not moving. The stand out moment of the whole performance was a song which I think was Happiness, where he burst in to full voice and got the loudest cheer of the whole gig. At least, until he bowed when the band were done, I think everyone was just happy he wasn't looking at them any more.
Rise Against
Energetic, but I never knew enough of their stuff to really enjoy. They were still probably better than The View, though.
Jay-Zed
I suffered through him to get a good spot for Kasabian, and he was quite good at what he was doing. I would never value the medium he pedals, but he at least has my respect for being good with the crowd, which he really, really was.
Kasabian
Delayed slightly by Jay-Zed over-running, they certainly made up for it. There was a slight down patch in the middle where they played either a new song or cover that no-one had heard of and some slower songs, but songs like The Doberman, Reason is Treason and Cutt Off certainly made up for it. The encore of Fire, Vlad the Impaler and L.S.F. was also the perfect way to close the night. If you watch the video of Fire, right around the time the first chorus starts is where I get an elbow to the face and lose my glasses. I was a bit pissed, but thankful and surprised that it had taken that long over the weekend. I also never thought I would enjoy getting "I love you fucking Jocks" shouted at me, but Tom Meighan in all his arse-hole-ness pulled it off. Outstanding.
And that was the end. There is patter that will never die, such as "Peter, you're fucking wrecked," calling people a "crank," d'you want a game of basketball ya prick?" and the immortal "RIDDLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!" Fantastic, and the wristband i'm never taking off will be a lasting reminder. All that's left to do is catch up on the telly I missed...
Wednesday, 7 July 2010
Things I Have an Opinion On #21
T in the Park 2010
Now that I have everything that I need for 4 days in a field, I can start looking towards what music i'll be going to see over the weekend. While this years line-up has far too many black people and X Factor rejects playing, there are some hidden diamonds behind the Friday and Sunday headliners. The following list is who I will be going to see, as well as songs I dearly hope they play.
Delphic
Fresh from this years AOTY so far in January, Delphic will be playing the Red Bull blah blah blah stage on Friday. There's a review of Acolyte on this blog somewhere, and Counterpoint will be one of the top moments of the weekend (should they play it).
Editors
Going by what the current line-up sheet says, I will now be able to see Editors! They were originally playing the Main Stage whilst Delphic were up, but it seems to have changed now. An extremely irritating spectacle live, Editors will at least be entertaining, and one of the more talented bands playing this weekend should provide plenty of enjoyment. Material from last album In This Light And On This Evening should be given a good airing, which is handy as it's their best to date.
Muse
The biggest headliner at the festival, Muse will undoubtedly be the biggest draw over the weekend. Their live show, by all accounts, has become slightly stale since HAARP was released, but then that wasn't exactly a bad performance. We'll all just be hoping for some of the following to compensate for that.
We Are Scientists
A talented if unremarkable band, We Are Scientists are a talented bunch when playing live. Fantastically under-rated since they first broke on to the scene, hopefully there wont be too many morons at their slot in the King Tut's tent on Saturday, and people who know songs outwith Nobody Move can enjoy them (I have a cheek, the only album of theirs I have is With Love and Squalor).
Rodrigo Y Gabriella
Here is the first instance that the person doing the slots for bands hates me, as there's 3 bands on at once I want to see on Saturday. RYG are two people (brother and sister) from Mexico, who may be among the most remarkable and talented guitarists on the planet currently. You're not going to get huge rock performances, but you will get a talented performance of songs that everyone loves. See them being lazy when doing a Pink Floyd cover and letting the crowd do all the work.
Newton Faulkner
While I honestly can't say why I haven't yet bought his 2nd album, the man with the ginger dreadlocks follows in the Rodrigo Y Gabriella mould, only combining talented guitar play with a fantastic voice. He's on the main stage where he deserves, all that's left will be to battle the people who just know Dream Catch Me....
Stereophonics
The band that will probably win out over Rodrigo Y Gabriella, festival mainstays playing the main stage on Saturday will definately be one of the highlights of the weekend. If the rumours of Eminem pulling out are true (dear god please), then these guys headlining on the Saturday wouldn't be too bad. Just as long as they play Hurry Up and Wait, i'll be perfectly happy. I'll even be happy enough to put up with the Dakota fans.
Hurts
Sunday sees the largest amount of bands I want to see that no-one i'm going with does, and Hurts probably come at the top of that pile. A Manchester band whose debut album isn't released til October, they combine what made the 80's great with some newer sounds and come off as one of the hottest bands on the scene right now. You wont even have to worry about not knowing lyrics to most of their songs, seeing as they're just new.
Billy Talent
Probably proof that Canada really shouldn't do music, Billy Talent will bring their... energy to the NME stage on Sunday. A band i'll definately be seeing on my own should I get there, you know you're least going to get to jump about a lot and get very injured whilst getting shouted at. Plus, most folk who go to T in the Park wont have the faintest idea who they are. Just don't play anything off of album number 3.
Rise Against
A band I definately feel ashamed of putting on here, as my sole knowledge of their work is the songs that have been on Guitar Hero games, that is Prayer of the Refugee and Re-Education Through Labour. They still come under the Billy Talent label however, of being a fantastic live band that not many folk going to T in the Park will know, so you'll at least get a good place to see them from.
Biffy Clyro
A band who i'm quite sure don't leave Balado after each fesitval but just stay there so they're ready for next year, Biffy will undoubtedly be the band that everyone who likes Many of Horror will go and see. Such morons will of course ruin it for decent people like me who are aware that they have 5 albums and not two, and would rather listen to Justboy and 57 than Bubbles and Who's Gotta Match. Puzzle and Only Revolutions are both fantastic albums with fantastic songs, but Biffy really need to stop being ashamed of their past work. It's not that bad, as this video will demonstrate.
Kasabian
I'm on fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiire doo doo doooo doodoodooo dooo doo doo doodoo.
Fuck off. Get Test Transmission/LSF/Reason is Treason/Club Foot to close and you have one of the best ends to a festival ever.
And, that's everyone. All that's left to do now is mourn the fact that Pearl Jam are somewhere in Iberia for the next weekend, and that shite like Eminem is headlining the main stage. Hopefully the rumours about him pulling out are true, and Thom Yorke and Jonny Greenwood can pop up and save the day again. That would be worth the total money i'm spending on this alone:
See you there, and hope it's dry.
Now that I have everything that I need for 4 days in a field, I can start looking towards what music i'll be going to see over the weekend. While this years line-up has far too many black people and X Factor rejects playing, there are some hidden diamonds behind the Friday and Sunday headliners. The following list is who I will be going to see, as well as songs I dearly hope they play.
Delphic
Fresh from this years AOTY so far in January, Delphic will be playing the Red Bull blah blah blah stage on Friday. There's a review of Acolyte on this blog somewhere, and Counterpoint will be one of the top moments of the weekend (should they play it).
Editors
Going by what the current line-up sheet says, I will now be able to see Editors! They were originally playing the Main Stage whilst Delphic were up, but it seems to have changed now. An extremely irritating spectacle live, Editors will at least be entertaining, and one of the more talented bands playing this weekend should provide plenty of enjoyment. Material from last album In This Light And On This Evening should be given a good airing, which is handy as it's their best to date.
Muse
The biggest headliner at the festival, Muse will undoubtedly be the biggest draw over the weekend. Their live show, by all accounts, has become slightly stale since HAARP was released, but then that wasn't exactly a bad performance. We'll all just be hoping for some of the following to compensate for that.
We Are Scientists
A talented if unremarkable band, We Are Scientists are a talented bunch when playing live. Fantastically under-rated since they first broke on to the scene, hopefully there wont be too many morons at their slot in the King Tut's tent on Saturday, and people who know songs outwith Nobody Move can enjoy them (I have a cheek, the only album of theirs I have is With Love and Squalor).
Rodrigo Y Gabriella
Here is the first instance that the person doing the slots for bands hates me, as there's 3 bands on at once I want to see on Saturday. RYG are two people (brother and sister) from Mexico, who may be among the most remarkable and talented guitarists on the planet currently. You're not going to get huge rock performances, but you will get a talented performance of songs that everyone loves. See them being lazy when doing a Pink Floyd cover and letting the crowd do all the work.
Newton Faulkner
While I honestly can't say why I haven't yet bought his 2nd album, the man with the ginger dreadlocks follows in the Rodrigo Y Gabriella mould, only combining talented guitar play with a fantastic voice. He's on the main stage where he deserves, all that's left will be to battle the people who just know Dream Catch Me....
Stereophonics
The band that will probably win out over Rodrigo Y Gabriella, festival mainstays playing the main stage on Saturday will definately be one of the highlights of the weekend. If the rumours of Eminem pulling out are true (dear god please), then these guys headlining on the Saturday wouldn't be too bad. Just as long as they play Hurry Up and Wait, i'll be perfectly happy. I'll even be happy enough to put up with the Dakota fans.
Hurts
Sunday sees the largest amount of bands I want to see that no-one i'm going with does, and Hurts probably come at the top of that pile. A Manchester band whose debut album isn't released til October, they combine what made the 80's great with some newer sounds and come off as one of the hottest bands on the scene right now. You wont even have to worry about not knowing lyrics to most of their songs, seeing as they're just new.
Billy Talent
Probably proof that Canada really shouldn't do music, Billy Talent will bring their... energy to the NME stage on Sunday. A band i'll definately be seeing on my own should I get there, you know you're least going to get to jump about a lot and get very injured whilst getting shouted at. Plus, most folk who go to T in the Park wont have the faintest idea who they are. Just don't play anything off of album number 3.
Rise Against
A band I definately feel ashamed of putting on here, as my sole knowledge of their work is the songs that have been on Guitar Hero games, that is Prayer of the Refugee and Re-Education Through Labour. They still come under the Billy Talent label however, of being a fantastic live band that not many folk going to T in the Park will know, so you'll at least get a good place to see them from.
Biffy Clyro
A band who i'm quite sure don't leave Balado after each fesitval but just stay there so they're ready for next year, Biffy will undoubtedly be the band that everyone who likes Many of Horror will go and see. Such morons will of course ruin it for decent people like me who are aware that they have 5 albums and not two, and would rather listen to Justboy and 57 than Bubbles and Who's Gotta Match. Puzzle and Only Revolutions are both fantastic albums with fantastic songs, but Biffy really need to stop being ashamed of their past work. It's not that bad, as this video will demonstrate.
Kasabian
I'm on fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiire doo doo doooo doodoodooo dooo doo doo doodoo.
Fuck off. Get Test Transmission/LSF/Reason is Treason/Club Foot to close and you have one of the best ends to a festival ever.
And, that's everyone. All that's left to do now is mourn the fact that Pearl Jam are somewhere in Iberia for the next weekend, and that shite like Eminem is headlining the main stage. Hopefully the rumours about him pulling out are true, and Thom Yorke and Jonny Greenwood can pop up and save the day again. That would be worth the total money i'm spending on this alone:
See you there, and hope it's dry.
Sunday, 4 July 2010
This Band Like to Flaunt Their Sexuality You Know...
Night Work - Scissor Sisters - Album Review
Fresh from a break in recording, Scissor Sisters this week came out with their third album, Night Work. Following on from the success of second album Ta-Dah which was darker than its title and the opening track, the ultimate in oxymoron song titles, suggested. Ta-Dah was a fabulous progression from the band, as their eponymous debut saw slightly un-tamed talent at times going wild, sandwiched between Pink Floyd covers and knock-offs, and the piano ballad which they can pull out. After these two albums, the band had two choices. Either go back to their origins and focus on sheer energy to create good songs, or carry on from the second album using stuff that most "rockier" bands wouldn't turn their nose up.
Two goes at writing the album subsequently produced neither of these, as Night Work posesses very little in common with the bands preious efforts. Night Work has been an album which is something of a grower, starting out as horribly repetitive but becoming distinguishable the more you listen to it. Whether or not this is a good thing remains to be seen however, as the work does seem fairly sub-par once you get into it all. The opening title track is a hidden gem, one song which fulfills the promise put out in all the various launch publicity: that it will get you dancing. Lead single Fire With Fire is by far the best song present, ranking up with the best of the bands material. The only problem with using a song like this as a lead single is that it draws attention to it, thus making you focus on how badly the rest of the songs stack up against it. Sex and Violence seems to be the only song that acknowledges that Ta-Dah even happened, combining the edgier sound of that album with the new club feel, and it works. Sadly, it's one of the few instances where it does.
Despite the rather apparent message put out by a band whose name is derived from a lesbian sex act, Night Work seems very confused in many ways. Bear in mind, I don't mean lyrics-wise. There's stuff in here that would make Jarvis Cocker cringe, even when he was in the middle of writing His 'n' Hers. The influences however have came a long way from hazy images of Syd Barrett floating around 20 feet off a stage. They have gone back in time however, as all of the songs are heavily influenced by the New York club scene of the 80's. There's everything here, Erasure, Eurythmics, and any 2 piece synth pop group that ever appeared on Top of the Pops. Closing track Invisible Light had better have seen some royalties go to whoever composed the backing beat for Confusion by New Order (presumably Steve Morris, though i've no idea). There's nothing wrong with being influenced by the best artists of a genre, but the main problem here is that for most of the songs, the band never seem to know which way they want to pull, and the songs end up seeming very thinly-spread, with no big tasty mouthfuls for you to really get stuck into. It gets even worse on a track like Harder You Get, which seems to have taken a wrong turn at around 1983 and started channeling Journey, going by the guitar work. This, much like a lot of the rest of the album, seems over the top and out of place. And you know that if you can describe the Scissor Sisters as too over the top, then something has gone badly wrong.
To sum up, this album is a disappointment. Like so many albums that can be classed as such, it's the stand-out moments that leave you feeling deflated, because you know what the band are actually capable of. Let's hope that they can properly channel the potential here for the next album.
====================================
Next week: No idea when it first came out, but as a favour for a friend, i'll be doing Is This It, This Is It or Whatever It Is Called by The Strokes
Fresh from a break in recording, Scissor Sisters this week came out with their third album, Night Work. Following on from the success of second album Ta-Dah which was darker than its title and the opening track, the ultimate in oxymoron song titles, suggested. Ta-Dah was a fabulous progression from the band, as their eponymous debut saw slightly un-tamed talent at times going wild, sandwiched between Pink Floyd covers and knock-offs, and the piano ballad which they can pull out. After these two albums, the band had two choices. Either go back to their origins and focus on sheer energy to create good songs, or carry on from the second album using stuff that most "rockier" bands wouldn't turn their nose up.
Two goes at writing the album subsequently produced neither of these, as Night Work posesses very little in common with the bands preious efforts. Night Work has been an album which is something of a grower, starting out as horribly repetitive but becoming distinguishable the more you listen to it. Whether or not this is a good thing remains to be seen however, as the work does seem fairly sub-par once you get into it all. The opening title track is a hidden gem, one song which fulfills the promise put out in all the various launch publicity: that it will get you dancing. Lead single Fire With Fire is by far the best song present, ranking up with the best of the bands material. The only problem with using a song like this as a lead single is that it draws attention to it, thus making you focus on how badly the rest of the songs stack up against it. Sex and Violence seems to be the only song that acknowledges that Ta-Dah even happened, combining the edgier sound of that album with the new club feel, and it works. Sadly, it's one of the few instances where it does.
Despite the rather apparent message put out by a band whose name is derived from a lesbian sex act, Night Work seems very confused in many ways. Bear in mind, I don't mean lyrics-wise. There's stuff in here that would make Jarvis Cocker cringe, even when he was in the middle of writing His 'n' Hers. The influences however have came a long way from hazy images of Syd Barrett floating around 20 feet off a stage. They have gone back in time however, as all of the songs are heavily influenced by the New York club scene of the 80's. There's everything here, Erasure, Eurythmics, and any 2 piece synth pop group that ever appeared on Top of the Pops. Closing track Invisible Light had better have seen some royalties go to whoever composed the backing beat for Confusion by New Order (presumably Steve Morris, though i've no idea). There's nothing wrong with being influenced by the best artists of a genre, but the main problem here is that for most of the songs, the band never seem to know which way they want to pull, and the songs end up seeming very thinly-spread, with no big tasty mouthfuls for you to really get stuck into. It gets even worse on a track like Harder You Get, which seems to have taken a wrong turn at around 1983 and started channeling Journey, going by the guitar work. This, much like a lot of the rest of the album, seems over the top and out of place. And you know that if you can describe the Scissor Sisters as too over the top, then something has gone badly wrong.
To sum up, this album is a disappointment. Like so many albums that can be classed as such, it's the stand-out moments that leave you feeling deflated, because you know what the band are actually capable of. Let's hope that they can properly channel the potential here for the next album.
====================================
Next week: No idea when it first came out, but as a favour for a friend, i'll be doing Is This It, This Is It or Whatever It Is Called by The Strokes
Sunday, 27 June 2010
If Only We Could've Been Closer
Closer - Joy Division - Album Review
Thirty years is a long time in music, and it can be an important stretch of time for not just bands, but whole genres. Given the amount of music that has come and gone since 1980, it's remarkable that 4 blokes from Manchester whose highest charting single was #13, and who only produced two albums can be still considered one of the most important bands in history. Joy Division are of course, and its why their music, fronted by the hurting lyrics of the late Ian Curtis, is still listened to today, and held in such high regard.
Joy Divisions strength never was in their individual musical ability. Bernard Sumner only took up guitar because he didn't want a 'real job,' and his playing style hasn't altered since. Steve Morris is vastly more talented on drums, and Peter Hook saw the lack of a bonified lead guitarist as his cue to leave teeth-rattling basslines at the forefront of the bands music, so why are they still so highly regarded? It couldn't have just been Ian Curtis, when he committed suicide, New Order then went on to be one of the biggest bands in the world, arguably outstripping Joy Division. What Joy Division were able to do however (for these purposes, Joy Division = with Ian Curtis, New Order = without) was combine the sparse guitar, metronomic, endless drumming and bone-rattling bass with a wonderfully awkward singer of someone who clearly had more on his mind.
While debut album Unknown Pleasures had this in spades, Closer's message couldn't have been more clear (with hindsight) than if he'd pulled out a razorblade in front of the rest of the band and went to town on his wrists. Written at a time when things in Curtis' life were reaching a point so intense no-one should ever have to deal with, the words completely mirror his feelings, and offer a frightening insight into his mind. There's not a song which doesn't touch on his life and the problems in it, and only Joy Division could provide the musical backdrop which made the album so powerful and hard-hitting. Opener Atrocity Exhibition starts with a haunting view of what the pressure of fame can do to you, and from there Closer covers all the bases. You have depression, the issues with him cheating on his wife, battles with epilepsy and a generally bleak view on life. And despite the dark subject matter, Closer manages to be something close to a perfect album, and one of the most beautiful pieces of art ever commited to record.
In terms of a progression for the band, Closer is immense. It sounds more grown-up than Unknown Pleasures. the addition of synths give the band an extra dimension and help the songs sound more haunting. That they could go from UP to Closer in a year is astounding, most bands today take 5 years to come close to such a leap forward. The most prevalent example of the synths is in closing track Decades, which is possibly the darkest song on the album, but still has an outro that you could listen to endlessly. Other songs like Colony and Twenty Four Hours however hark back to the days where Joy Division sounded like they were playing as if their lives depended on it, and these tracks don't sound out of place at all.
Closer is an album that is over 30 years old. Joy Division is a band that ended over 30 years ago. Ian Curtis is a musical genius who died over 30 years ago. Let not the amount of time or the automatic hero-worship points that suicide committing musicians get attributed, Joy Division are one of the 5 most important bands in musical history, and Close is the perfect example why.
==================================
Next week, Night Work by Scissor Sisters
Thirty years is a long time in music, and it can be an important stretch of time for not just bands, but whole genres. Given the amount of music that has come and gone since 1980, it's remarkable that 4 blokes from Manchester whose highest charting single was #13, and who only produced two albums can be still considered one of the most important bands in history. Joy Division are of course, and its why their music, fronted by the hurting lyrics of the late Ian Curtis, is still listened to today, and held in such high regard.
Joy Divisions strength never was in their individual musical ability. Bernard Sumner only took up guitar because he didn't want a 'real job,' and his playing style hasn't altered since. Steve Morris is vastly more talented on drums, and Peter Hook saw the lack of a bonified lead guitarist as his cue to leave teeth-rattling basslines at the forefront of the bands music, so why are they still so highly regarded? It couldn't have just been Ian Curtis, when he committed suicide, New Order then went on to be one of the biggest bands in the world, arguably outstripping Joy Division. What Joy Division were able to do however (for these purposes, Joy Division = with Ian Curtis, New Order = without) was combine the sparse guitar, metronomic, endless drumming and bone-rattling bass with a wonderfully awkward singer of someone who clearly had more on his mind.
While debut album Unknown Pleasures had this in spades, Closer's message couldn't have been more clear (with hindsight) than if he'd pulled out a razorblade in front of the rest of the band and went to town on his wrists. Written at a time when things in Curtis' life were reaching a point so intense no-one should ever have to deal with, the words completely mirror his feelings, and offer a frightening insight into his mind. There's not a song which doesn't touch on his life and the problems in it, and only Joy Division could provide the musical backdrop which made the album so powerful and hard-hitting. Opener Atrocity Exhibition starts with a haunting view of what the pressure of fame can do to you, and from there Closer covers all the bases. You have depression, the issues with him cheating on his wife, battles with epilepsy and a generally bleak view on life. And despite the dark subject matter, Closer manages to be something close to a perfect album, and one of the most beautiful pieces of art ever commited to record.
In terms of a progression for the band, Closer is immense. It sounds more grown-up than Unknown Pleasures. the addition of synths give the band an extra dimension and help the songs sound more haunting. That they could go from UP to Closer in a year is astounding, most bands today take 5 years to come close to such a leap forward. The most prevalent example of the synths is in closing track Decades, which is possibly the darkest song on the album, but still has an outro that you could listen to endlessly. Other songs like Colony and Twenty Four Hours however hark back to the days where Joy Division sounded like they were playing as if their lives depended on it, and these tracks don't sound out of place at all.
Closer is an album that is over 30 years old. Joy Division is a band that ended over 30 years ago. Ian Curtis is a musical genius who died over 30 years ago. Let not the amount of time or the automatic hero-worship points that suicide committing musicians get attributed, Joy Division are one of the 5 most important bands in musical history, and Close is the perfect example why.
==================================
Next week, Night Work by Scissor Sisters
Monday, 21 June 2010
Bi-jove!
As i've not put reviews out in ages, i'll get back into with something that should've been done mid-May. Seeing as there's nothing decent out currently, i'll look at albums that celebrate a milestone of being released. This week, we have Binaural from Pearl Jam, as it's something i've been listening to a lot recently. Closer by Joy Division'll follow at some point, probably the week after next.
Binaural is Pearl Jam's 6th album, which is remarkable when you consider that album #1 was released in 1991, and Binaural out in 2000. One thing you could (and still can) count on PJ for at that point was for their albums to be, if nothing else, solid, and easily top albums of the year in which they were released. Binaural, despite what critics and sales may indicate, was no different.
Binaural didn't produce any great singles, or any classic songs for which PJ are remembered like they are for others, but there's certainly enough quality on here to define a band. Eddie Vedder suffered bad bouts (if it occurs in such a manner) of writer's block whilst making this album, but when you listen to the full thing, you can't understand how. He contributes the words to 8 of the 13 songs present, including all the stand-out moments. The rest of the band are as wonderful as ever, proving that they can move out of their old comfort-zone of grunge, experimenting with different genres and recording methods (hence the name of the album). Despite the difference in genre, most of the songs sound like they came about the old-fashioned way, through jam sessions.
As mentioned, lyrical prowess is a key featyre of Pearl Jam's work, and it's not any less-so here. From Breakerfall, a tale about a womans unrequited love, to Nothing as It Seems, a song which draws infulence from Pink Floyd with distorted guitars dripping off it, and lyrics from bassist Jeff Ament about a difficult childhood life. Sleight of Hand is a true moment of genius. Another track with hazy guitar effects, the story told is both poignant and relevant to a mass audience, which is part of Pearl Jam's draw to so many loyal fans. Other stand out points include Soon Forget, written by Vedder in one go and featuring music solely from a ukelele, which draws on one of the favourite Pearl Jam influences: homelessness. Gods' Dice, Light Years, Insignificance, Grievance and Of the Girl are all also easily up there with the bands best work.
Binaural can be seen as a pivotal event in Pearl Jam's history, as the tour for this album spawned the bands bootleg collection, which still runs strong to this day. Done by recording a lot of the bands live shows and making them into CD's available for purchase on their website and at gigs, it allows fans to get affordable access to the bands music. 72 such bootlegs were released between 2000-2001 during the tour for Binaural, setting a record for most albums debuting in the Billboard 200 chart in America at the one time. Pearl Jam are the only band to do such a series of releases (so far as I know, feel free to correct me) and it shows a fantastic dedication to their fans, and how grounded they have remained despite their fame. That each show costs $9.99 (£6.70) as a digital download is remarkable, especially in this current climate where money seems to be the only motivation for making music.
If you don't listen to Pearl Jam (your loss), then I don't recommend listening to Binaural first. Do it properly, start at Ten and work your way through. Just know, that by the time you get to Binaural, the brilliance wont let down for a second.
(PS: Sorry for the title. I was really, really stuck)
Binaural is Pearl Jam's 6th album, which is remarkable when you consider that album #1 was released in 1991, and Binaural out in 2000. One thing you could (and still can) count on PJ for at that point was for their albums to be, if nothing else, solid, and easily top albums of the year in which they were released. Binaural, despite what critics and sales may indicate, was no different.
Binaural didn't produce any great singles, or any classic songs for which PJ are remembered like they are for others, but there's certainly enough quality on here to define a band. Eddie Vedder suffered bad bouts (if it occurs in such a manner) of writer's block whilst making this album, but when you listen to the full thing, you can't understand how. He contributes the words to 8 of the 13 songs present, including all the stand-out moments. The rest of the band are as wonderful as ever, proving that they can move out of their old comfort-zone of grunge, experimenting with different genres and recording methods (hence the name of the album). Despite the difference in genre, most of the songs sound like they came about the old-fashioned way, through jam sessions.
As mentioned, lyrical prowess is a key featyre of Pearl Jam's work, and it's not any less-so here. From Breakerfall, a tale about a womans unrequited love, to Nothing as It Seems, a song which draws infulence from Pink Floyd with distorted guitars dripping off it, and lyrics from bassist Jeff Ament about a difficult childhood life. Sleight of Hand is a true moment of genius. Another track with hazy guitar effects, the story told is both poignant and relevant to a mass audience, which is part of Pearl Jam's draw to so many loyal fans. Other stand out points include Soon Forget, written by Vedder in one go and featuring music solely from a ukelele, which draws on one of the favourite Pearl Jam influences: homelessness. Gods' Dice, Light Years, Insignificance, Grievance and Of the Girl are all also easily up there with the bands best work.
Binaural can be seen as a pivotal event in Pearl Jam's history, as the tour for this album spawned the bands bootleg collection, which still runs strong to this day. Done by recording a lot of the bands live shows and making them into CD's available for purchase on their website and at gigs, it allows fans to get affordable access to the bands music. 72 such bootlegs were released between 2000-2001 during the tour for Binaural, setting a record for most albums debuting in the Billboard 200 chart in America at the one time. Pearl Jam are the only band to do such a series of releases (so far as I know, feel free to correct me) and it shows a fantastic dedication to their fans, and how grounded they have remained despite their fame. That each show costs $9.99 (£6.70) as a digital download is remarkable, especially in this current climate where money seems to be the only motivation for making music.
If you don't listen to Pearl Jam (your loss), then I don't recommend listening to Binaural first. Do it properly, start at Ten and work your way through. Just know, that by the time you get to Binaural, the brilliance wont let down for a second.
(PS: Sorry for the title. I was really, really stuck)
Wednesday, 9 June 2010
Things I Have an Opinion On #20
Big Brother
A culmination of the PlayStation Network being down for maintainence and my exams being over mean I am back blogging! Now I have no distraction, hopefully I can get back into it and satisfy the 6 people who actually read the things. As such, I find it fitting my return to complaining on the internet will coincide with something which has been complained about since it first started, and that is the name now synonymous with reality television, "Big Brother."
Big Brother should not be known purely for being a television programme. Most people who watch it would vaguely be able to tell you where the name comes from, what it means, or what is symbolises. The name is derived from one of the greatest books ever written, "Nineteen Eighty-Four" by George Orwell. In this, Big Brother is the symbol for the leader of the Party, who hold government. Who Big Brother is and where he is based is never known, and the ultimate goal for all people of Oceania is to simultaneously love and hate Big Brother, and act upon his every word. In this sense, the telly programme has been fantastically accurate, as the saps who go in follow every whim of whoever sits and dreams up the rules, and it has been both loved and hated by the public since its inception at the start of the last decade.
I personally have never watched an episode outwith the launch shows, mainly because I have a brain. While it may have been interesting originally, it soon changed as the years went past, becoming a horrible metaphor that developed with society, only here, it was broadcast to us 24 hours a day. Farce is the only word that can really describe what has resulted however, as the people on show are simply desperate for a bit of fame, and as they have no discernable talents, they feel that being on this stupid programme and flashing some skin will get them somewhere. Has it? Can even the most ardent BB anorak remember people outwith the winners? I doubt it, and that's why I feel sorry for the people on this and the people who watch it. People whose lives are so mundane that they have to watch people cooped up in a house for 3 months (that's how long you'll have to put up with this one) have to be one of the most depressing groups you could imagine.
Like most normal people, i'm glad that the series that starts this evening is the last. Even though it may have been a good idea at first, it lost its mojo long ago, and it ending means that i'll be able to watch E4 without seeing adverts for it and the 83 spin-off shows, I wont have to watch DAVINA MCCALL shouting at me, and I wont have my Scrubs interuppted.
A culmination of the PlayStation Network being down for maintainence and my exams being over mean I am back blogging! Now I have no distraction, hopefully I can get back into it and satisfy the 6 people who actually read the things. As such, I find it fitting my return to complaining on the internet will coincide with something which has been complained about since it first started, and that is the name now synonymous with reality television, "Big Brother."
Big Brother should not be known purely for being a television programme. Most people who watch it would vaguely be able to tell you where the name comes from, what it means, or what is symbolises. The name is derived from one of the greatest books ever written, "Nineteen Eighty-Four" by George Orwell. In this, Big Brother is the symbol for the leader of the Party, who hold government. Who Big Brother is and where he is based is never known, and the ultimate goal for all people of Oceania is to simultaneously love and hate Big Brother, and act upon his every word. In this sense, the telly programme has been fantastically accurate, as the saps who go in follow every whim of whoever sits and dreams up the rules, and it has been both loved and hated by the public since its inception at the start of the last decade.
I personally have never watched an episode outwith the launch shows, mainly because I have a brain. While it may have been interesting originally, it soon changed as the years went past, becoming a horrible metaphor that developed with society, only here, it was broadcast to us 24 hours a day. Farce is the only word that can really describe what has resulted however, as the people on show are simply desperate for a bit of fame, and as they have no discernable talents, they feel that being on this stupid programme and flashing some skin will get them somewhere. Has it? Can even the most ardent BB anorak remember people outwith the winners? I doubt it, and that's why I feel sorry for the people on this and the people who watch it. People whose lives are so mundane that they have to watch people cooped up in a house for 3 months (that's how long you'll have to put up with this one) have to be one of the most depressing groups you could imagine.
Like most normal people, i'm glad that the series that starts this evening is the last. Even though it may have been a good idea at first, it lost its mojo long ago, and it ending means that i'll be able to watch E4 without seeing adverts for it and the 83 spin-off shows, I wont have to watch DAVINA MCCALL shouting at me, and I wont have my Scrubs interuppted.
Wednesday, 2 June 2010
I Think Gary Glitter Just Blew a Nut
Originally posted on 12/4/10
Final Fantasy XIII - PS3 Game Review
As far as my experience of playing RPG's goes, it's not wonderful. It's only ever been Pokemon for me, and lets be fair, a Game Boy screen isn't exactly the same as a next-gen console, and in terms of credability, there's quite a difference. Pokemon is a franchise that spawned just about every form of media (one of the films was on channel 2 the other day, fuck me, so awful), while Final Fantasy is one of the more socially questionable things to enjoy, going by what I hear from them. I've never played one before, being put off by the concept of there being more than one game that by the name states the first should be the last, but as it was the only thing to rent, I decided to give #13 a go.
From the moment I put the disc in I knew it was a bad idea. The game starting in some strange floating planet that's got fighting, with some wee twerp with blue hair, another twerp with hair that looked like fire and a crappy body warmer all led by an 8 ft tall guy in a trench coat with this irritating wee bit of hair between his eyes hanging from his bandana that whatever the circumstances never seems to move. This big chap is of course Snow, someone whose cheeky confidence you're supposed to warm to throughout. Alrighty then.
On to another story thread (with no warning) and we have a burd who's apparently a soldier, although the hot-pants she had on made me slightly suspicious as to which army she was with. Add to this the fact her name is Lightning and that she looks like Kimi Raikkonen, you know she's going to be someone that you can admire. She was paired with the token black guy, who is completely in no way a racial stereotype and will not die at any point in the game (none of them do I don't think), but he may as well be wearing the "I-die-or-turn-evil-t-shirt." You can imagine the kind of awful lines he's going to hit out with too. Don't forget that a small bird lives in his afro that he frequently talks to.
If you thought these 3 were bad, then it gets worse. Snow decides to get a rag-tag bunch of misfits together to fight the evil oppression (don't even ask, i'll come back to that later) and in the process, some burd (who we later find out is called Nora, rather hilariously) dies. That would be fine, were she not the mother of the saddest, most pathetic example of a human being I have ever come across both in gaming and in real life. Rather horribly, he's called Hope. Despite being so pathetic he probably cries if he steps in a puddle, he is still able, like all the characters, to pull a boomerang out his arse (literally) and fight stuff ranging from giant robotic bulbasaurs to something called a "Ushumgal Subjugator" without a moments thought, then going back to being weedy, un-fit and pathetic. Fantastic consistency.
There is hope for.... Hope however, as he's accompanied by a small ginger burd called Vanille, who like everyone has questionable clothing. Her lack of clothing however is made up for by the fact that she is the most ridiculously over-the-top enternally optimistic little freak to ever have been imagined by human kind. I am honestly at a loss for how to describe her, she's so.... irritating it beggars belief, and with her Australian accent (christ knows how we get Australian accents here) it just gets worse as the game goes on. Not to mention that any time this burd isn't speaking she's making horrible little giggly moans and groans, and you start to think that this game is designed by the kind of oddballs who normally make people like this with tentacles going up her vagina.
The opening sequences of the game don't exactly fill you with much hope if you were expecting something good, going down some very linear and very samey corridors fighting indentical enemies all the way through is rather boring, and it lasts for quite a while. In fairness, this never really changed throughout the game, only the scenery really changes, granted there's a few ridiculous bossfights as I mentioned earlier, but there's not much variety. This is apt however, as there's not much variety in the fighting system. It's turn based, and like good ole Pokemon, you start out with a few moves, and as you defeat more and better enemies you get more and better attacks. The only problem with this is the agonising wait for your hit meter to fill up so you can use them again, while whatever you're fighting with is beating the shit out you with attacks that would normally make a human disintegrate. There are things you can do, such as discern the attributes of your enemies (yawn) or use items, like potions, to re-fill you health.
This awful fighting system is buoyed slightly with the introduction of "Paradigm Shifting," where you can change what type of attacks your party members will carry out. This can get quite annoyinh when you've only got two people (see Lightning/Hope) and you have to change non-stop in order to keep yourself alive while still putting up a decent fight. In one boss battle where I only had Lightning and Hope, it took me 21 minutes to finish, only to be told rather smugly that the recommended time was 8. Unless I was missing something quite drastic, the game was talking out its arse, which does get quite wearing after a while. It is slightly more bearable when you can go up to 3 fighting party members, but this is even more irritating as you can't choose who you control, nor who else fights with you at any given moment. This means that all the upgrades you put into a character to make them your (only) really good medic are wasted if they're not fighting. That and the leveling up system is absurd, winning battles gets you points to put towards upgrades, but the upgrading takes place in this weird thing called the Crystarium (or something, I never payed much attention to it) which looks like a cross between the movie Tron and a pack of pastel-coloured crayons. It's utterly pointless as well, simply a few drop-down menus would have done the exact same job and made you want to vomit less.
On the subject of looks, one thing that the makers can be commended for is imagination. While the majority of the game takes place in what are essentially giant corridors, the background to these is spectacular if ridiculous. You shift from lush green grass lands to war-torn cities to giant blue forests to a crystalised ocean. For some odd reason you get flashbacks everynow and then which take you to "The Seaside City of Bodhum" where you get to learn about the characters (BORING) backstories, even getting to play Snow as he runs after his poor fiance once she's found out she is a l'Cie.
What now follows is an attempt at making sense of the uttely awful story into something that could provide reasons for anything that 've so far witnessed:
There are two worlds, Pulse with one floating aboive it called Cocoon
Cocoon is inhabited by big robots called Fal'Cie
Fal'Cie's can turn people into l'Cie's by giving them a mark
If they l'Cie complete their focus (even though they don't know what it is), they gain eternal life
Makes sense, sort of. Only problem is that everyone in Cocoon hates people from Pulse, particularly l'Cie, they have a guerrila corps army specifically designed to deal with them. I think that's everything, the only problem is that none of this is clearly explained, Even the flashbacks explain buggar all, and only set out to make the characters more annoying and less identifiable with. Honestly, even with my playtime (which I think was around 14 hours), I didn't give a rats arse about anyone, the entire world of Cocoon (I think that's where it is) could blow up and I wouldn't even be pissed that the ending was crap, only happy there was one.
Whatever the end result of all of that is I don't know (I think i'm just past halfway), but I do have some praise for Final Fantasy 13. Despite all of its glaring failures, facepalm moments and dialogue that will make you ashamed language was invented.... I grew to like it. I don't quite know what it was, be it simply a desire to finish, a desire to see how bad it got or a begrudging admiration for it... but I would consider buying it. Although my experience in the field is limited, it does seem like a good example of a JRPG, and i'd quite like to finish it, so you could say I enjoyed it. Maybe even liked it.
Final Fantasy XIII - PS3 Game Review
As far as my experience of playing RPG's goes, it's not wonderful. It's only ever been Pokemon for me, and lets be fair, a Game Boy screen isn't exactly the same as a next-gen console, and in terms of credability, there's quite a difference. Pokemon is a franchise that spawned just about every form of media (one of the films was on channel 2 the other day, fuck me, so awful), while Final Fantasy is one of the more socially questionable things to enjoy, going by what I hear from them. I've never played one before, being put off by the concept of there being more than one game that by the name states the first should be the last, but as it was the only thing to rent, I decided to give #13 a go.
From the moment I put the disc in I knew it was a bad idea. The game starting in some strange floating planet that's got fighting, with some wee twerp with blue hair, another twerp with hair that looked like fire and a crappy body warmer all led by an 8 ft tall guy in a trench coat with this irritating wee bit of hair between his eyes hanging from his bandana that whatever the circumstances never seems to move. This big chap is of course Snow, someone whose cheeky confidence you're supposed to warm to throughout. Alrighty then.
On to another story thread (with no warning) and we have a burd who's apparently a soldier, although the hot-pants she had on made me slightly suspicious as to which army she was with. Add to this the fact her name is Lightning and that she looks like Kimi Raikkonen, you know she's going to be someone that you can admire. She was paired with the token black guy, who is completely in no way a racial stereotype and will not die at any point in the game (none of them do I don't think), but he may as well be wearing the "I-die-or-turn-evil-t-shirt." You can imagine the kind of awful lines he's going to hit out with too. Don't forget that a small bird lives in his afro that he frequently talks to.
If you thought these 3 were bad, then it gets worse. Snow decides to get a rag-tag bunch of misfits together to fight the evil oppression (don't even ask, i'll come back to that later) and in the process, some burd (who we later find out is called Nora, rather hilariously) dies. That would be fine, were she not the mother of the saddest, most pathetic example of a human being I have ever come across both in gaming and in real life. Rather horribly, he's called Hope. Despite being so pathetic he probably cries if he steps in a puddle, he is still able, like all the characters, to pull a boomerang out his arse (literally) and fight stuff ranging from giant robotic bulbasaurs to something called a "Ushumgal Subjugator" without a moments thought, then going back to being weedy, un-fit and pathetic. Fantastic consistency.
There is hope for.... Hope however, as he's accompanied by a small ginger burd called Vanille, who like everyone has questionable clothing. Her lack of clothing however is made up for by the fact that she is the most ridiculously over-the-top enternally optimistic little freak to ever have been imagined by human kind. I am honestly at a loss for how to describe her, she's so.... irritating it beggars belief, and with her Australian accent (christ knows how we get Australian accents here) it just gets worse as the game goes on. Not to mention that any time this burd isn't speaking she's making horrible little giggly moans and groans, and you start to think that this game is designed by the kind of oddballs who normally make people like this with tentacles going up her vagina.
The opening sequences of the game don't exactly fill you with much hope if you were expecting something good, going down some very linear and very samey corridors fighting indentical enemies all the way through is rather boring, and it lasts for quite a while. In fairness, this never really changed throughout the game, only the scenery really changes, granted there's a few ridiculous bossfights as I mentioned earlier, but there's not much variety. This is apt however, as there's not much variety in the fighting system. It's turn based, and like good ole Pokemon, you start out with a few moves, and as you defeat more and better enemies you get more and better attacks. The only problem with this is the agonising wait for your hit meter to fill up so you can use them again, while whatever you're fighting with is beating the shit out you with attacks that would normally make a human disintegrate. There are things you can do, such as discern the attributes of your enemies (yawn) or use items, like potions, to re-fill you health.
This awful fighting system is buoyed slightly with the introduction of "Paradigm Shifting," where you can change what type of attacks your party members will carry out. This can get quite annoyinh when you've only got two people (see Lightning/Hope) and you have to change non-stop in order to keep yourself alive while still putting up a decent fight. In one boss battle where I only had Lightning and Hope, it took me 21 minutes to finish, only to be told rather smugly that the recommended time was 8. Unless I was missing something quite drastic, the game was talking out its arse, which does get quite wearing after a while. It is slightly more bearable when you can go up to 3 fighting party members, but this is even more irritating as you can't choose who you control, nor who else fights with you at any given moment. This means that all the upgrades you put into a character to make them your (only) really good medic are wasted if they're not fighting. That and the leveling up system is absurd, winning battles gets you points to put towards upgrades, but the upgrading takes place in this weird thing called the Crystarium (or something, I never payed much attention to it) which looks like a cross between the movie Tron and a pack of pastel-coloured crayons. It's utterly pointless as well, simply a few drop-down menus would have done the exact same job and made you want to vomit less.
On the subject of looks, one thing that the makers can be commended for is imagination. While the majority of the game takes place in what are essentially giant corridors, the background to these is spectacular if ridiculous. You shift from lush green grass lands to war-torn cities to giant blue forests to a crystalised ocean. For some odd reason you get flashbacks everynow and then which take you to "The Seaside City of Bodhum" where you get to learn about the characters (BORING) backstories, even getting to play Snow as he runs after his poor fiance once she's found out she is a l'Cie.
What now follows is an attempt at making sense of the uttely awful story into something that could provide reasons for anything that 've so far witnessed:
There are two worlds, Pulse with one floating aboive it called Cocoon
Cocoon is inhabited by big robots called Fal'Cie
Fal'Cie's can turn people into l'Cie's by giving them a mark
If they l'Cie complete their focus (even though they don't know what it is), they gain eternal life
Makes sense, sort of. Only problem is that everyone in Cocoon hates people from Pulse, particularly l'Cie, they have a guerrila corps army specifically designed to deal with them. I think that's everything, the only problem is that none of this is clearly explained, Even the flashbacks explain buggar all, and only set out to make the characters more annoying and less identifiable with. Honestly, even with my playtime (which I think was around 14 hours), I didn't give a rats arse about anyone, the entire world of Cocoon (I think that's where it is) could blow up and I wouldn't even be pissed that the ending was crap, only happy there was one.
Whatever the end result of all of that is I don't know (I think i'm just past halfway), but I do have some praise for Final Fantasy 13. Despite all of its glaring failures, facepalm moments and dialogue that will make you ashamed language was invented.... I grew to like it. I don't quite know what it was, be it simply a desire to finish, a desire to see how bad it got or a begrudging admiration for it... but I would consider buying it. Although my experience in the field is limited, it does seem like a good example of a JRPG, and i'd quite like to finish it, so you could say I enjoyed it. Maybe even liked it.
Things I Have an Opinion On #19
Originally posted on 9/4/10
The news that AOL has put Bebo up for sale.
I've put this blog off for a while, for two reasons. Both laziness and enkoying watching the hypocrisy of the sayings from people in my lifestream. First thing, find me an article which said it was being closed down last night. Better yet, one that says it's being shut down now. Can you? No. AOL says that if there's no buyer by the END OF MAY then it will be shut down. A whole month and a half there for people with no access to calendars.
I've never liked AOL. I never liked this advert: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g35-39XZIhk, the burd with the dress that showed the internet scared me, and I hate watching old episodes of Friends and seeing a thing at the bottom of the screen at the end saying AOL Keyword: Friends, who cares about your shite AOL Keywords? My hatred of AOL intesified when as a complete computer noob, I was subjected to their shite browser and log-in service, the annoying sound of dial-up and the idiotic option to have Alan Partridge tell me if I have e-mail or not. Scratch that, he was amazing. But still, AOL is shite.
No wonder then that they buy a website for 850 million in 2008 (a good time for bebo, my peak of profile views came in June of that year) and less than two years want to flush it all down the pan, what a pile of shite. Granted, Bebo is losing users but that simply brings up the question, why?
It seems they've all pissed off to Facebook which in my opinion is astounding. Asking a friend today (Barry McAuley, if you want to scold him) what was so much better about it, and he said that you can "like" statuses. Fantastic. In this internet-centred world where the English language is going to pot, the best feature of a website is something that allows you to not bother even writing that you appreciate what someone says, simply clicking a button that tells the person such. Outstanding. As anything that butchers the already crippled medium of proper communication makes me want to vomit, you can pretty much say I detest the core values of facebook already.
Why do I have it then you ask? Because everyone else does. However, what I fail to see is how it is this centre-point for so many people, with people claiming omg fb addiction! (i'm looking at you, Samantha Jones. Seriously, no-one cares) and me constantly being offered free gifts in Farmville. Look, I tried Farmville, it's shite. If I want to play games on a screen, i'll do something that doesn't involve growing fucking crops for a non-existant people. Nor do I care about the sort of groups I see, stuff titled "that moment when you're asleep but you think you're falling and you wake up and you realise that you were asleep," coupled with the volume of Sickipedia jokes that get passed off as original material. Why? What is so wonderful about this that you had to do it on Facebook rather than the Bebo sites that just about everyone had? Is it the pretty blue stripe at the top as opposed to the black one?
On the matter of page design, Facebook is simply another tool of the NWO to make everyone identical. Do you want an individual colour scheme on your home page? Bebo says yes, have whatever you like! Make your own shitey ones proclaiming love for someone who'll dump you in a week if you please! Facebook says no. You're not getting one, and all your page font will be irritatingly small and turn everything into your list of telly programmes/music into hyperlinks. Outstanding. As a skin-maker (a very poor one, by my own admission), I like personalising my page with whatever I feel strongly about at the time (although I never made an In Rainbows one annoyingly), I like knowing that when someone (most recently Dominique, although Cogan and Conner like to send me mean things occasionally) bothers to go on my page or leave a comment that they will see a picture of a road in Billings, Montana, or that they will see Chris Stewart or they will see Radiohead in all caps. Facebook, no dice.
Bebo's been good over the years. Providing both a platform for my thoughts and a platform for stalking, paedophilia, the failed Colony of Comedians, secret communicae and many a heightened discussion between me and many others, all you Facebook snobs cannot deny that it's been good to you, and that it's ironic that everyone saying "wow lol, bebo's still here, does anyone care?" (Laura Moore this time, was David's chocolate starfish delicious? Just so you know, this has put paid to both Kirsty Black and Dylan McCrones ability to eat Milky Way Magic Stars) has simply proven that despite your claims, you still care about bebo on some level if you've came back to mock its demise.
Well, I think i've said all I have to say on this matter. As Bebo's future is uncertain, I shall now be doing what I told myself I would do ages ago (I think its creation date is Sep 09), and actually using a blog website to put out my thoughts.
http://theunreasonablevoiceofreason.blogspot.com/
Suscribe, enjoy and consider yourself with a heartfelt thank you from me if you're ever taken time to read anything i've put out here. Take note that from now on on Bebo, I will again be ripping off Craig Johnstone and posting my true feelings on just about everything.
The news that AOL has put Bebo up for sale.
I've put this blog off for a while, for two reasons. Both laziness and enkoying watching the hypocrisy of the sayings from people in my lifestream. First thing, find me an article which said it was being closed down last night. Better yet, one that says it's being shut down now. Can you? No. AOL says that if there's no buyer by the END OF MAY then it will be shut down. A whole month and a half there for people with no access to calendars.
I've never liked AOL. I never liked this advert: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g35-39XZIhk, the burd with the dress that showed the internet scared me, and I hate watching old episodes of Friends and seeing a thing at the bottom of the screen at the end saying AOL Keyword: Friends, who cares about your shite AOL Keywords? My hatred of AOL intesified when as a complete computer noob, I was subjected to their shite browser and log-in service, the annoying sound of dial-up and the idiotic option to have Alan Partridge tell me if I have e-mail or not. Scratch that, he was amazing. But still, AOL is shite.
No wonder then that they buy a website for 850 million in 2008 (a good time for bebo, my peak of profile views came in June of that year) and less than two years want to flush it all down the pan, what a pile of shite. Granted, Bebo is losing users but that simply brings up the question, why?
It seems they've all pissed off to Facebook which in my opinion is astounding. Asking a friend today (Barry McAuley, if you want to scold him) what was so much better about it, and he said that you can "like" statuses. Fantastic. In this internet-centred world where the English language is going to pot, the best feature of a website is something that allows you to not bother even writing that you appreciate what someone says, simply clicking a button that tells the person such. Outstanding. As anything that butchers the already crippled medium of proper communication makes me want to vomit, you can pretty much say I detest the core values of facebook already.
Why do I have it then you ask? Because everyone else does. However, what I fail to see is how it is this centre-point for so many people, with people claiming omg fb addiction! (i'm looking at you, Samantha Jones. Seriously, no-one cares) and me constantly being offered free gifts in Farmville. Look, I tried Farmville, it's shite. If I want to play games on a screen, i'll do something that doesn't involve growing fucking crops for a non-existant people. Nor do I care about the sort of groups I see, stuff titled "that moment when you're asleep but you think you're falling and you wake up and you realise that you were asleep," coupled with the volume of Sickipedia jokes that get passed off as original material. Why? What is so wonderful about this that you had to do it on Facebook rather than the Bebo sites that just about everyone had? Is it the pretty blue stripe at the top as opposed to the black one?
On the matter of page design, Facebook is simply another tool of the NWO to make everyone identical. Do you want an individual colour scheme on your home page? Bebo says yes, have whatever you like! Make your own shitey ones proclaiming love for someone who'll dump you in a week if you please! Facebook says no. You're not getting one, and all your page font will be irritatingly small and turn everything into your list of telly programmes/music into hyperlinks. Outstanding. As a skin-maker (a very poor one, by my own admission), I like personalising my page with whatever I feel strongly about at the time (although I never made an In Rainbows one annoyingly), I like knowing that when someone (most recently Dominique, although Cogan and Conner like to send me mean things occasionally) bothers to go on my page or leave a comment that they will see a picture of a road in Billings, Montana, or that they will see Chris Stewart or they will see Radiohead in all caps. Facebook, no dice.
Bebo's been good over the years. Providing both a platform for my thoughts and a platform for stalking, paedophilia, the failed Colony of Comedians, secret communicae and many a heightened discussion between me and many others, all you Facebook snobs cannot deny that it's been good to you, and that it's ironic that everyone saying "wow lol, bebo's still here, does anyone care?" (Laura Moore this time, was David's chocolate starfish delicious? Just so you know, this has put paid to both Kirsty Black and Dylan McCrones ability to eat Milky Way Magic Stars) has simply proven that despite your claims, you still care about bebo on some level if you've came back to mock its demise.
Well, I think i've said all I have to say on this matter. As Bebo's future is uncertain, I shall now be doing what I told myself I would do ages ago (I think its creation date is Sep 09), and actually using a blog website to put out my thoughts.
http://theunreasonablevoiceofreason.blogspot.com/
Suscribe, enjoy and consider yourself with a heartfelt thank you from me if you're ever taken time to read anything i've put out here. Take note that from now on on Bebo, I will again be ripping off Craig Johnstone and posting my true feelings on just about everything.
Throw as Many Stones as You Like
Originally posted on 4/4/10
Dirt - Kids in Glass Houses - Album Review
This can be a very annoying task on occasion. Normally i'm full of things to say about whatever it is i'm reviewing, be it reluctant praise or unbridled contempt, but this week i'm so stuck I don't even have a title. I have a lot to say about Dirt, but i'm still undecided on whether I like it or not.
Kids in Glass Houses' first album was annoying for me in a lot of ways. Not least that I spent �14 on it and hated it on first listen, but there was more than that once i'd heard it a few times and got to see it fully. While it was by no means perfect or as accomplished as it was capable of being, there were decent songs, even it most of the better ones were quite samey or had awful lyrics (see Easy Tiger, where the chorus is lucky to contain words). Moving on to their second album, most bands in this situation improve, create more fully-fledged songs and gain a lot of credility in doing so (see Max�mo Park). Kids in Glass Houses appear to have bypassed this however, and simply ripped off anything vaguely emo in the past 3 years. When I put the CD in for the first time, my immediate thought was "i've heard this album this year" as opener Artbreaker I (they cleverly put Artbreaker II at the end) uses the same intro as The Consequence by You Me At Six. This rather sets the tone for the rest of the album, with some awful screaming and some crap lyrics "Fumble with the stranger in your bed/Fuck yourself into the record books instead" (not exact but it could work), and couple this with two horrendously awful duets featuring the burd with the bean-do out The Saturdays and New Found Glory, a band who I have to hate on principle, and you're getting towards an album that's so bad it makes you ill.
On those two duets, Undercover Lover is so vomit-inducing it should be outlawed under public decency laws, and Maybe Tomorrow is a classic example of what to do when you realise a record is failing; throw in some backing vocals that chant over a chorus to add some depth. Unfortunately, they only serve to show how shallow the song and the rest of the album is. Everything on it seems to be done to a paint by numbers kind of scheme, with no real imagination in any of it. It's competant certainly, but it's certainly not remarkable. Aled Phillips' (what a rock star name) voice is also very often completely unable to sing the songs here, see The Morning Afterlife which is that wee slow number that bands like this put on to show they have the depth to sing a tender ballad, only for it to blow up in their face. It combines strings with screaming for christ's sake. There's no progression here from the last album, there's nothing original or vaguely unique that you could listen to and think 'this band are going places.'
Credit where it's due, there are stand-outs. When it's not dying in a sea of fringes and whining, moments like Matters at All, Hunt the Haunted and The Best is Yet to Come sprout up. These are the things that give you some vague hope that KIGC will avoid becoming one of about 20 bands going around that you hate. Because ultimately, if you'd just heard this album for the first time, you would assume that they're one of those awful bands like Madina Lake or We Are the Ocean who should just be rounded up and shot. As mentioned though, there are moments that make them worthy of your time, even though you'll wish you weren't listening at all. For this band to have any hope they'll have to hope their prophecy comes true, and that the best really is yet to come.
Dirt - Kids in Glass Houses - Album Review
This can be a very annoying task on occasion. Normally i'm full of things to say about whatever it is i'm reviewing, be it reluctant praise or unbridled contempt, but this week i'm so stuck I don't even have a title. I have a lot to say about Dirt, but i'm still undecided on whether I like it or not.
Kids in Glass Houses' first album was annoying for me in a lot of ways. Not least that I spent �14 on it and hated it on first listen, but there was more than that once i'd heard it a few times and got to see it fully. While it was by no means perfect or as accomplished as it was capable of being, there were decent songs, even it most of the better ones were quite samey or had awful lyrics (see Easy Tiger, where the chorus is lucky to contain words). Moving on to their second album, most bands in this situation improve, create more fully-fledged songs and gain a lot of credility in doing so (see Max�mo Park). Kids in Glass Houses appear to have bypassed this however, and simply ripped off anything vaguely emo in the past 3 years. When I put the CD in for the first time, my immediate thought was "i've heard this album this year" as opener Artbreaker I (they cleverly put Artbreaker II at the end) uses the same intro as The Consequence by You Me At Six. This rather sets the tone for the rest of the album, with some awful screaming and some crap lyrics "Fumble with the stranger in your bed/Fuck yourself into the record books instead" (not exact but it could work), and couple this with two horrendously awful duets featuring the burd with the bean-do out The Saturdays and New Found Glory, a band who I have to hate on principle, and you're getting towards an album that's so bad it makes you ill.
On those two duets, Undercover Lover is so vomit-inducing it should be outlawed under public decency laws, and Maybe Tomorrow is a classic example of what to do when you realise a record is failing; throw in some backing vocals that chant over a chorus to add some depth. Unfortunately, they only serve to show how shallow the song and the rest of the album is. Everything on it seems to be done to a paint by numbers kind of scheme, with no real imagination in any of it. It's competant certainly, but it's certainly not remarkable. Aled Phillips' (what a rock star name) voice is also very often completely unable to sing the songs here, see The Morning Afterlife which is that wee slow number that bands like this put on to show they have the depth to sing a tender ballad, only for it to blow up in their face. It combines strings with screaming for christ's sake. There's no progression here from the last album, there's nothing original or vaguely unique that you could listen to and think 'this band are going places.'
Credit where it's due, there are stand-outs. When it's not dying in a sea of fringes and whining, moments like Matters at All, Hunt the Haunted and The Best is Yet to Come sprout up. These are the things that give you some vague hope that KIGC will avoid becoming one of about 20 bands going around that you hate. Because ultimately, if you'd just heard this album for the first time, you would assume that they're one of those awful bands like Madina Lake or We Are the Ocean who should just be rounded up and shot. As mentioned though, there are moments that make them worthy of your time, even though you'll wish you weren't listening at all. For this band to have any hope they'll have to hope their prophecy comes true, and that the best really is yet to come.
Your Own Advice is Always What You Should Go By
Originally posted on 28/3/10
Keep Calm and Carry On - Stereophonics - Album Review
I think this'll be the last time I go on about opening singles. Purely because I shouldn't have the nerve to do it for an album that came out last year, and because i'm getting bored of it myself. Keep Calm and Carry On is Stereophonics' 7th album, and while I have 3/7ths of them, they all seem to follow the same formula. Fairly catchy lead single, with a fairly similar album but with a few hidden gems. KCACO follows this up, and while Innocent is a decent song, it's one of those lead singles which is simply a mask for a far superior album that follows it. Even the lead song, the imaginitively titled She's Alright, is something which hides a much more enjoyable labour that's been recorded here.
For 7 albums, musically there's not been much change. Granted they bothered to include the extra guitarist as a band member this time, so there's a bit more depth on some tracks which would have been weaker otherwise. There's some new area explored, the weird electronic sounding Beerbottle which coupled with a decent set of lyrics makes for a decent song. Closer Show Me How makes good use of the piano as well, and shows that Kelly Jones' voice can be used in all its harshness for something soft and heartfelt. Overall though, if you're looking for something new musically, don't bother. They've found their style, stuck with it and managed to stay successful off of it.
Lyrically, i've never set much by Stereophonics. Aside from most of them being indecipherable, there's very often few which have meaningful ones (to me at least). For KCACO however the boat's been pushed out, and once you get over hearing "She's Alright" about 80 times, you get some good stuff. There's stories told in Beerbottle and there's heartfelt and downright beauty on offer in Show Me How and Could You Be the One. I was truly taken aback by some of the words thrown together here, and as I said, the man with a girls names voice gets to show some level of emotion other than raspy strained anguish, and he's actually able to pull it off. As a result, this album has more depth than previous efforts (or, the ones i've heard). Where they can go from this I don't know, but if they keep calm and carry on the way they are then they wont go far wrong.
I never bought this album when it came out as Innocent seemed so bland it was beige, but i'm glad I got it now. A fantastic album, which while cementing Stereophonics' place as Wales' 2nd best band, is completely worth your time, and will keep their reputation going.
Keep Calm and Carry On - Stereophonics - Album Review
I think this'll be the last time I go on about opening singles. Purely because I shouldn't have the nerve to do it for an album that came out last year, and because i'm getting bored of it myself. Keep Calm and Carry On is Stereophonics' 7th album, and while I have 3/7ths of them, they all seem to follow the same formula. Fairly catchy lead single, with a fairly similar album but with a few hidden gems. KCACO follows this up, and while Innocent is a decent song, it's one of those lead singles which is simply a mask for a far superior album that follows it. Even the lead song, the imaginitively titled She's Alright, is something which hides a much more enjoyable labour that's been recorded here.
For 7 albums, musically there's not been much change. Granted they bothered to include the extra guitarist as a band member this time, so there's a bit more depth on some tracks which would have been weaker otherwise. There's some new area explored, the weird electronic sounding Beerbottle which coupled with a decent set of lyrics makes for a decent song. Closer Show Me How makes good use of the piano as well, and shows that Kelly Jones' voice can be used in all its harshness for something soft and heartfelt. Overall though, if you're looking for something new musically, don't bother. They've found their style, stuck with it and managed to stay successful off of it.
Lyrically, i've never set much by Stereophonics. Aside from most of them being indecipherable, there's very often few which have meaningful ones (to me at least). For KCACO however the boat's been pushed out, and once you get over hearing "She's Alright" about 80 times, you get some good stuff. There's stories told in Beerbottle and there's heartfelt and downright beauty on offer in Show Me How and Could You Be the One. I was truly taken aback by some of the words thrown together here, and as I said, the man with a girls names voice gets to show some level of emotion other than raspy strained anguish, and he's actually able to pull it off. As a result, this album has more depth than previous efforts (or, the ones i've heard). Where they can go from this I don't know, but if they keep calm and carry on the way they are then they wont go far wrong.
I never bought this album when it came out as Innocent seemed so bland it was beige, but i'm glad I got it now. A fantastic album, which while cementing Stereophonics' place as Wales' 2nd best band, is completely worth your time, and will keep their reputation going.
Things I Have an Opinion On #17
Originally posted on 28/3/10
Lewis Hamilton
Ever since the boy wonder came into Formula One, there was an air of expectation about him. Someone who'd won races for fun throughout his career, and could be the first good British sportsman in a long time. Everyone was happy. So was I, I enjoyed his driving style when he first started, he was unlucky to not win the championship in his first year, and then he was extremely lucky to win it on the last corner the following year.
Next season, it really went downhill. Aside from his irritating American accent that he's picked up, as well as his annoying older woman who smacks of someone who doesn't have the faintest idea what's going on, dear Lewis showed that even as someone in his 3rd year in the sport, that he's an impressionable wee twerp. If you're unaware of what happened in Melbourne with Trulli, then allow me to summarise:
Trulli in front of Hamilton.
Yellow flag waved, no overtaking.
Past yellows, Hamilton passes Trulli
Hamilton is told by engineer to let Trulli through.
Trulli goes through.
This was done with the sole intention of reporting Trulli and getting him disqualified. As this is a rather unsporting move, Lewis and his engineer decided to keep shtoom about it all. Unfortunately however, someone forgot to tell them about the wonder of team radio, so the audio clip of their conversation became public knowledge, name dragged through the mud, etc. I didn't care in the slightest, until I saw poor Lewis' grovelling apology: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJ-drYnTMKA
What an absolute pile of shite. "Oh no look at me, i'm the world champion of my sport at 21, i'm on 15million a year and all of thius made me want to quit."
Hold on a minute. You do not quit when you are 21, making 15 million a year, get a fucking grip you big personality-bypassed lump of wood, grow a fucking pair and get a reality check. There was none of this shite when you were trying to run Alonso off the track and the team was telling you to hold back, now it's all the teams fault? Essentially a bigger boy made me do it? Fuck right off, you should have even the faintest clue about how to act in a situation like this, otherwise you shouldn't be allowed out of the house on your own.
If you thought this wasn't nauseating enough however, this very weekend he's again shown what an immature prat he is. Giving it burnouts in the middle of an Australian street, then shiting himself when the polis turned up. Hiding from the camera when he's getting questioned, and then stating that he's worried his reputation is damaged. Know what all this makes me think? I miss Kimi Raikkonen. Someone who actually acts normally when being the attention of tons of money and tons of burds, and can actually drive a car well. None of this caring about public image crap, you turn up to racr a car, nothing else.
I realise that the media circus which has become integral to Lewis' career (has he ever made you want to switch to a Santander account, or use Vodaphone incidentally?) but he needs to remember how to be a normal human being in there, because he's quickly turning into one of the most irritating people on the planet. He needs to loosen up, and just enjoy being an ultra-rich 22 year old.
Oh and he was crap today. Jenson FTW!
Lewis Hamilton
Ever since the boy wonder came into Formula One, there was an air of expectation about him. Someone who'd won races for fun throughout his career, and could be the first good British sportsman in a long time. Everyone was happy. So was I, I enjoyed his driving style when he first started, he was unlucky to not win the championship in his first year, and then he was extremely lucky to win it on the last corner the following year.
Next season, it really went downhill. Aside from his irritating American accent that he's picked up, as well as his annoying older woman who smacks of someone who doesn't have the faintest idea what's going on, dear Lewis showed that even as someone in his 3rd year in the sport, that he's an impressionable wee twerp. If you're unaware of what happened in Melbourne with Trulli, then allow me to summarise:
Trulli in front of Hamilton.
Yellow flag waved, no overtaking.
Past yellows, Hamilton passes Trulli
Hamilton is told by engineer to let Trulli through.
Trulli goes through.
This was done with the sole intention of reporting Trulli and getting him disqualified. As this is a rather unsporting move, Lewis and his engineer decided to keep shtoom about it all. Unfortunately however, someone forgot to tell them about the wonder of team radio, so the audio clip of their conversation became public knowledge, name dragged through the mud, etc. I didn't care in the slightest, until I saw poor Lewis' grovelling apology: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJ-drYnTMKA
What an absolute pile of shite. "Oh no look at me, i'm the world champion of my sport at 21, i'm on 15million a year and all of thius made me want to quit."
Hold on a minute. You do not quit when you are 21, making 15 million a year, get a fucking grip you big personality-bypassed lump of wood, grow a fucking pair and get a reality check. There was none of this shite when you were trying to run Alonso off the track and the team was telling you to hold back, now it's all the teams fault? Essentially a bigger boy made me do it? Fuck right off, you should have even the faintest clue about how to act in a situation like this, otherwise you shouldn't be allowed out of the house on your own.
If you thought this wasn't nauseating enough however, this very weekend he's again shown what an immature prat he is. Giving it burnouts in the middle of an Australian street, then shiting himself when the polis turned up. Hiding from the camera when he's getting questioned, and then stating that he's worried his reputation is damaged. Know what all this makes me think? I miss Kimi Raikkonen. Someone who actually acts normally when being the attention of tons of money and tons of burds, and can actually drive a car well. None of this caring about public image crap, you turn up to racr a car, nothing else.
I realise that the media circus which has become integral to Lewis' career (has he ever made you want to switch to a Santander account, or use Vodaphone incidentally?) but he needs to remember how to be a normal human being in there, because he's quickly turning into one of the most irritating people on the planet. He needs to loosen up, and just enjoy being an ultra-rich 22 year old.
Oh and he was crap today. Jenson FTW!
JLUAAFOWYSNGOMTDDAPITS
Originally posted on 21/3/10
JLS - JLS - Album Review
Let's get one thing straight, I hate this band. I hate them and everything the represent. I am only reviewing their first (and only) album as Martin decided to bring up the JLS/Muse mud-slinging (not a debate, as a debate has two sides), and even i'm fed up of it. As such, this completely objective review will once and for all provide a fair view of it.
Normally when I review an album I make comments on progression from previous work, vocals, lyrics and instrumental talent. Obviously, I can't do any of those for this, so we'll have to look at it differently. While boy band pop is a perfectly legitimate music genre, albeit one that should've followed acid house's example and died in the 90's, JLS manage to rip-off all the best aspects (or, least bad) of it, combine it with some modern r'n'b beats and production and still manage to sound like something that Robbie Williams circa Rudebox would have rejected for sounding too cheesy. By looking at pretty much every song title, you will be able to guess what the song will be like. Nor does it help when they're all pretty much the same. Beat Again manages to be something of a standout, but that's like saying Hitler was a standout member of the Nazi party. Given that you could take the choruses and verses from it, rearrange them in any order and still have something that sounds exactly the same, you get the point i'm trying to make. There's zero imagination, nothing particularly distinguishing, and by the end you couldn't pick out anything particularly memorable about what you just wasted the last three minutes of your life on.
I talked about opening singles and what they can say about an album last week, a type I never mentioned was the lead single that is track #1 on the album. Very rarely do these ever turn out to be more than masks for a bad album, the only one I can think of that is safe is An End Has a Start by Editors. Not surprisingly, JLS hides behind Beat Again, albeit in the manner of a fat 7 year old using a lamp-post in a game of hide and seek. The following song is the following single, the wonderfully bland Everybody in Love, which is so beige i'm surprised the video wasn't shot in a nursing home.
While i'm at videos, I should elaborate on another reason I hate these types of bands. Aside from the fact they're all identical, they may as well just be put up on giant screens at their "concerts." From the various videos going around, i'm yet to see one where JLS actually sing live. I do see the reasoning behind this however, because they sure can't sing on the record, why bother embarassing yourself by doing it live? Aside from the odd strained harmony, there are no 'good' voices. There's also the odd burst of auto-tune, which always does nothing but raise the quality of a record. The absurd pitch changes wont distract from the toe-curling-ly awful lyrics though, stuff so cheesy even the French would turn their nose up at it. Everything seems to be aimed at the hearts of the young and impressionable, and while you'll hate society while listening to this because you know people will actually accept the lyrics, you're cheered by the fact that when they get over their crush on OMGASTON or OMG.......whoever else is in it, that they might find music with substance to base their lives around.
I hate music like this. Mainly because it isn't music. None of it is real. These 4 scrubs came second in a talent contest to a burd with a big nose, yet have gone on to be arguably more successful than her. I implore you, please stop buying crap like this. Please stop voting for all of these reality tv shows, particularly anything that has Simon Cowell's bored drawling smirk over it. While JLS are so forgettable even while you listen to them that you know within 6 months at most they will have fallen out of the public's consciousness completely, there will always be something else cookie-cutter to replace them. It is a sad indication of the world today that music with such little depth, with all the substance of the atmosphere of the moon, can manage to be bought by over one million people. It is not music, and should be treated as such. Ultimately, the album is the equivalent of chewing gum, something that gives you a very artificial burst of goodness at the beginning, then after about 30 seconds goes bitter and leaves you desperately aching for a bin to spit it out into, then searching for something worthwhile to clean the taste out of your mouth with.
JLS - JLS - Album Review
Let's get one thing straight, I hate this band. I hate them and everything the represent. I am only reviewing their first (and only) album as Martin decided to bring up the JLS/Muse mud-slinging (not a debate, as a debate has two sides), and even i'm fed up of it. As such, this completely objective review will once and for all provide a fair view of it.
Normally when I review an album I make comments on progression from previous work, vocals, lyrics and instrumental talent. Obviously, I can't do any of those for this, so we'll have to look at it differently. While boy band pop is a perfectly legitimate music genre, albeit one that should've followed acid house's example and died in the 90's, JLS manage to rip-off all the best aspects (or, least bad) of it, combine it with some modern r'n'b beats and production and still manage to sound like something that Robbie Williams circa Rudebox would have rejected for sounding too cheesy. By looking at pretty much every song title, you will be able to guess what the song will be like. Nor does it help when they're all pretty much the same. Beat Again manages to be something of a standout, but that's like saying Hitler was a standout member of the Nazi party. Given that you could take the choruses and verses from it, rearrange them in any order and still have something that sounds exactly the same, you get the point i'm trying to make. There's zero imagination, nothing particularly distinguishing, and by the end you couldn't pick out anything particularly memorable about what you just wasted the last three minutes of your life on.
I talked about opening singles and what they can say about an album last week, a type I never mentioned was the lead single that is track #1 on the album. Very rarely do these ever turn out to be more than masks for a bad album, the only one I can think of that is safe is An End Has a Start by Editors. Not surprisingly, JLS hides behind Beat Again, albeit in the manner of a fat 7 year old using a lamp-post in a game of hide and seek. The following song is the following single, the wonderfully bland Everybody in Love, which is so beige i'm surprised the video wasn't shot in a nursing home.
While i'm at videos, I should elaborate on another reason I hate these types of bands. Aside from the fact they're all identical, they may as well just be put up on giant screens at their "concerts." From the various videos going around, i'm yet to see one where JLS actually sing live. I do see the reasoning behind this however, because they sure can't sing on the record, why bother embarassing yourself by doing it live? Aside from the odd strained harmony, there are no 'good' voices. There's also the odd burst of auto-tune, which always does nothing but raise the quality of a record. The absurd pitch changes wont distract from the toe-curling-ly awful lyrics though, stuff so cheesy even the French would turn their nose up at it. Everything seems to be aimed at the hearts of the young and impressionable, and while you'll hate society while listening to this because you know people will actually accept the lyrics, you're cheered by the fact that when they get over their crush on OMGASTON or OMG.......whoever else is in it, that they might find music with substance to base their lives around.
I hate music like this. Mainly because it isn't music. None of it is real. These 4 scrubs came second in a talent contest to a burd with a big nose, yet have gone on to be arguably more successful than her. I implore you, please stop buying crap like this. Please stop voting for all of these reality tv shows, particularly anything that has Simon Cowell's bored drawling smirk over it. While JLS are so forgettable even while you listen to them that you know within 6 months at most they will have fallen out of the public's consciousness completely, there will always be something else cookie-cutter to replace them. It is a sad indication of the world today that music with such little depth, with all the substance of the atmosphere of the moon, can manage to be bought by over one million people. It is not music, and should be treated as such. Ultimately, the album is the equivalent of chewing gum, something that gives you a very artificial burst of goodness at the beginning, then after about 30 seconds goes bitter and leaves you desperately aching for a bin to spit it out into, then searching for something worthwhile to clean the taste out of your mouth with.
Things I Have an Opinion On #16
Originally posted on 21/3/10
The proposed "panic" button for Facebook
If you're unaware of how Facebook works (although no-one is, since everyone seems to think it's > than Bebo, which it isn't) then you can post updates from your profile in the manner of Twitter but being able to play games. People are able to comment on this, as well as clicking a button to "like" said update. As every good needs an evil (see Yin/Yang, Jedi/Sith, Me/Coldplay), this should follow the youtube method of commenting and allow you to dislike as well. It doesn't, and while there are groups on Facebook trying to get new buttons (the sooner we get a That's What She Said button, the better), it'll never happen.
This week however, there have been new proposals, put forth by the Home Secretary no less. Quite why he should be commenting on a social networking site is beyond me, but he feels there should be a "panic" button that people can click to alert police of potential paedophiles. Stuff like this makes me want Anarchy in this country, because i'd only ever vote Labour, and if they have these kinds of muppets in office like Alan Johnson, then there's no hope really. Imagine the scene:
15 year old girl logs in
15 year old girl has one friend request
Friend request from 17 year old boy
Friend request added
*3 months*
15 year old girl agrees to meet up with 17 year old boy 300 miles away from where she lives without telling anyone
The two meet
17 year old turns out to be 31 year old guy
Guy rapes girl
Guy kills girl
Now, imagine it with a panic button
15 year old girl logs in
15 year old girl has one friend request
Friend request from 17 year old boy
Friend request added
*3 months*
15 year old girl agrees to meet up with 17 year old boy 300 miles away from where she lives without telling anyone
The two meet
17 year old turns out to be 31 year old guy
Guy rapes girl
Guy kills girl
No difference. And why? Because if there is a girl as stupid as the hypothetical one above, then she will be so starved of attention she will unquestioningly agree to meet up with this fellow, and not go near a panic button. This whole move smacks of shutting the door after the horse has buggared off, as people have inexplicably suffered the fate described above, and rather than actually try and educate people on how to know when they're in danger, the government have made a lovely cop-out. Besides, if you ask me, if you're dumb enough to meet up with someone in the manner posted above, then you deserve taken off this mortal coil before you cause a powercut by trying to slide down some power cables like Cole from inFamous.
If the button were to be placed there, then fantastic. It could well stop paedophiles, and save the lives of the great brainwashed, but as with anything on the internet, it will be used for nefarious purposes. Say you want to play a joke on a friend.... click! he's a paedo! Say you're one of those irritating girls who changes their best friends every week, click! your ex BFF's a paedo!
Quite rightly, Facebook has given the idea a resounding "naw," and will carry on about its business as normal. Who knows what the government will poke its nose into next. Whatever that is and whenever it comes, I hope i'll not be showing my under-developed breasts to some fat man having a cheeky trouser wank.
The proposed "panic" button for Facebook
If you're unaware of how Facebook works (although no-one is, since everyone seems to think it's > than Bebo, which it isn't) then you can post updates from your profile in the manner of Twitter but being able to play games. People are able to comment on this, as well as clicking a button to "like" said update. As every good needs an evil (see Yin/Yang, Jedi/Sith, Me/Coldplay), this should follow the youtube method of commenting and allow you to dislike as well. It doesn't, and while there are groups on Facebook trying to get new buttons (the sooner we get a That's What She Said button, the better), it'll never happen.
This week however, there have been new proposals, put forth by the Home Secretary no less. Quite why he should be commenting on a social networking site is beyond me, but he feels there should be a "panic" button that people can click to alert police of potential paedophiles. Stuff like this makes me want Anarchy in this country, because i'd only ever vote Labour, and if they have these kinds of muppets in office like Alan Johnson, then there's no hope really. Imagine the scene:
15 year old girl logs in
15 year old girl has one friend request
Friend request from 17 year old boy
Friend request added
*3 months*
15 year old girl agrees to meet up with 17 year old boy 300 miles away from where she lives without telling anyone
The two meet
17 year old turns out to be 31 year old guy
Guy rapes girl
Guy kills girl
Now, imagine it with a panic button
15 year old girl logs in
15 year old girl has one friend request
Friend request from 17 year old boy
Friend request added
*3 months*
15 year old girl agrees to meet up with 17 year old boy 300 miles away from where she lives without telling anyone
The two meet
17 year old turns out to be 31 year old guy
Guy rapes girl
Guy kills girl
No difference. And why? Because if there is a girl as stupid as the hypothetical one above, then she will be so starved of attention she will unquestioningly agree to meet up with this fellow, and not go near a panic button. This whole move smacks of shutting the door after the horse has buggared off, as people have inexplicably suffered the fate described above, and rather than actually try and educate people on how to know when they're in danger, the government have made a lovely cop-out. Besides, if you ask me, if you're dumb enough to meet up with someone in the manner posted above, then you deserve taken off this mortal coil before you cause a powercut by trying to slide down some power cables like Cole from inFamous.
If the button were to be placed there, then fantastic. It could well stop paedophiles, and save the lives of the great brainwashed, but as with anything on the internet, it will be used for nefarious purposes. Say you want to play a joke on a friend.... click! he's a paedo! Say you're one of those irritating girls who changes their best friends every week, click! your ex BFF's a paedo!
Quite rightly, Facebook has given the idea a resounding "naw," and will carry on about its business as normal. Who knows what the government will poke its nose into next. Whatever that is and whenever it comes, I hope i'll not be showing my under-developed breasts to some fat man having a cheeky trouser wank.
And While You're At It, Tear Down Any Proof This Ever Existed
Originally posted on 14/3/10
Tear the Signs Down - The Automatic - Album Review
Opening singles from albums can be interesting things. They can be the one good song that a band actually produces, put out first so that the hype surrounding that will generate more album sales (see Fireflies - Owl City). They can be a taster of things to come, the first single masking wonders in greater quantities (see Smokers Outside the Hospital Doors - Editors.) The Automatic have been a band who managed to fulfill the latter criteria with their first two albums. With Recover from Not Accepted Anywhere (even though Monster got them noticed), and Steve McQueen from This is a Fix, The Automatic delivered singles that were representative of the rest of the album, and it was good. That was why, with Interstate being the first from the third album Tear the Signs Down, that I was worried. Interstate is awful. A boring chorus indescernible from the rest of the song, coupled with absolutely no energy or good riffs found before.
But perhaps it could be one of those other types of lead single, the one that's a sort of cover for an album that's far superior listened to as a whole?
Alas, no. Like Day & Age by The Killers, from the very first note of opener Insides, you know this isn't going to be good. A song that's bland when you're being kind, it simply sets you up for the rest of the album. There are absolutely no standout tracks on it, no standout moments even. Something like List that finishes with a weird string section just smacks of running out of ideas, and you can tell they're low on imagination throughout the rest anyway. From a vocalist in Rob Hawkins whose singing, whilst being a bit 'moany' at times, was once strong and angst-ridden, this is woeful. Take the chorus of Sweat Heat Noise (poor grammar as well as music). Here is something which is evidently supposed to be strained to emphasise the feeling behind it, all he ends up doing is sounding like his balls are in a machine vice. It's whiny claptrap, and something that deserves no place on an Automatic album.
This lack of energy could of course be explained by the lack of Alex Pennie, a man who described himself as "an annoying little man screaming on our record." Self deprecation aside, don't let his guest appearance on Never Mind the Buzzcocks fool you. He added the oomph to this band that gave them an edge over the synth-indie acts that were boring everyone to death in 2006, he gave them something different that hooked you in. While he wasn't in the band for 2008's best album This is a Fix, he had been there when a few songs were written, so there was still some of his spirit. The inclusion of a 2nd guitar for album #3 however seems to have taken away a dimension rather than added one, as all you get is tuneless droning. This is not the band that won so many hearts with their previous work.
An example of how generic the music is comes with closer, Tear it Down. In Heavy Rain, there is an instance in the prologue where you can turn on a CD player, and have it play what is essentially a 20 second loop of nameless music, like you get in The Sims. The intro to Tear it Down sounds exactly like this. Don't forget a song like High Time, something which is probably supposed to be a departure from the rest of the album, but ends up just sounding out of place, boring and outright weird.
Ultimately, Tear the Signs Down is awful. I had high hopes for this album being one of the best of 2010, and it has failed like Matthew Jones in an advanced physics exam. It is a disappointment, and without a doubt, not what this band are fully capable of.
Tear the Signs Down - The Automatic - Album Review
Opening singles from albums can be interesting things. They can be the one good song that a band actually produces, put out first so that the hype surrounding that will generate more album sales (see Fireflies - Owl City). They can be a taster of things to come, the first single masking wonders in greater quantities (see Smokers Outside the Hospital Doors - Editors.) The Automatic have been a band who managed to fulfill the latter criteria with their first two albums. With Recover from Not Accepted Anywhere (even though Monster got them noticed), and Steve McQueen from This is a Fix, The Automatic delivered singles that were representative of the rest of the album, and it was good. That was why, with Interstate being the first from the third album Tear the Signs Down, that I was worried. Interstate is awful. A boring chorus indescernible from the rest of the song, coupled with absolutely no energy or good riffs found before.
But perhaps it could be one of those other types of lead single, the one that's a sort of cover for an album that's far superior listened to as a whole?
Alas, no. Like Day & Age by The Killers, from the very first note of opener Insides, you know this isn't going to be good. A song that's bland when you're being kind, it simply sets you up for the rest of the album. There are absolutely no standout tracks on it, no standout moments even. Something like List that finishes with a weird string section just smacks of running out of ideas, and you can tell they're low on imagination throughout the rest anyway. From a vocalist in Rob Hawkins whose singing, whilst being a bit 'moany' at times, was once strong and angst-ridden, this is woeful. Take the chorus of Sweat Heat Noise (poor grammar as well as music). Here is something which is evidently supposed to be strained to emphasise the feeling behind it, all he ends up doing is sounding like his balls are in a machine vice. It's whiny claptrap, and something that deserves no place on an Automatic album.
This lack of energy could of course be explained by the lack of Alex Pennie, a man who described himself as "an annoying little man screaming on our record." Self deprecation aside, don't let his guest appearance on Never Mind the Buzzcocks fool you. He added the oomph to this band that gave them an edge over the synth-indie acts that were boring everyone to death in 2006, he gave them something different that hooked you in. While he wasn't in the band for 2008's best album This is a Fix, he had been there when a few songs were written, so there was still some of his spirit. The inclusion of a 2nd guitar for album #3 however seems to have taken away a dimension rather than added one, as all you get is tuneless droning. This is not the band that won so many hearts with their previous work.
An example of how generic the music is comes with closer, Tear it Down. In Heavy Rain, there is an instance in the prologue where you can turn on a CD player, and have it play what is essentially a 20 second loop of nameless music, like you get in The Sims. The intro to Tear it Down sounds exactly like this. Don't forget a song like High Time, something which is probably supposed to be a departure from the rest of the album, but ends up just sounding out of place, boring and outright weird.
Ultimately, Tear the Signs Down is awful. I had high hopes for this album being one of the best of 2010, and it has failed like Matthew Jones in an advanced physics exam. It is a disappointment, and without a doubt, not what this band are fully capable of.
Things I Have an Opinion On #15
Originally posted on 14/3/10
The video for 'Telephone' by Lady Gaga and Beyonce
As I need something to occupy me until the Grand Prix is on iplayer, and my English dissertation is much less inviting, i'll share my thoughts on the latest abhorrant clip from the worlds must bland popstar.
Since the invention of MTV, music started to go down the pan. Very rarely has the music video actually been used for any purpose beneficial to the music on store, often the video serves only to show some flesh in a desperate attempt to shift some more records from whatever cookie-cutter shite is the heart-throb of all fat 12 year old girls everywhere. There have been classic videos. Foo Fighters have a knack for doing good videos, Thriller by Michael Jackson is always a classic, and Pulp always had good videos, even if some were a bit odd.
Unfortunately however, for every good story told through a video/song combinatin (Stan by Eminem and Dido just came into my head), there are at least 10 band and unimaginitve songs with even more bland and unimaginitive videos to go with them. One Shot by JLS springs to mind, where one of the band members comes to the fore, doesn't even sing a word, simply pulling down the collar of his ill-fitting t-shirt to expose his pecs (remiscent of the photo of Rafferty from the party before last incidently). Fantastically arty, i'm sure you'll agree.
The level of tastelessness possible in videos however was not only surpassed, but obliterated in 2009, when 'Just Dance' hit our every sense. A wonderfully bland song that when I first heard it screamed 'get Gwen Stefani back in No Doubt,' accompanied with a video where Stefani Germanotta (I can't keep typing Gaga, sorry,) had on a rather bland hairstyle and outfit by her standards. Even still, it was rather revealing, and what she did whilst wearing it was suitably revolting, much like her nose when you see a close-up of her in the video.
Next up was.... Poker Face? Oh look, it's Just Dance with different words. Seriously, there is no difference.
Then came Bad Romance, admittedly the catchier of her songs, but still as boring and similar to the others as the rest. Germanott's solution? Take off more clothes in the video! Writhing around this time with what looks like white tape and a weird wig, backed with the kind of dancers who hadn't seen work since Luke threw the Emperor into the middle of the Death Star.
Now however, even dear Steffani has surpassed herself. Evidently she has some form of ADD, as even with record sales through the roof and a live tour which draw the starry-eyed and mindless in their droves, she has produced a 9 and a half minute video which rather than, as the length would suggest, tell a story, simply serves to prove that had this bint been around 20 years ago, she would have been sectioned under the mental health act. From the start, you know it's not going to be the most meaningful thing when she is clinging on to the inside of a jail cell wearing only nipple tape, see through stocking-y things and some pixels to cover what modesty she has left. (The best thing is, she's completely still while doing this, probably to make it easier to pixelate her penis). Moving on from this, her usual ensemble of mental outfits are on show, including a pair of specs adorned with lit fags (which she wears whilst a woman from the prison she's in who looks like Bourne villain feels her up), police tape and only police tape, some weird American flag thing, a bra and pants whilst accompanied by 5 clones dancing in a prison corridor, and the thing at the end that looks like a huge mosquito net. Oh, and she uses diet coke cans as hair rollers right before she starts singing.
So, what purpose does this serve? There's some sort of turgid Themla and Louise story rip-off, were Germanotta helps Beyonce poison her wank boyfriend, and they run away. Quite why the requires the stupid outfits and 3 minutes at the start before any singing comes in, or indeed why it's been paired with this song, which is a suitably bland piece of garbage, even by her standards. In my opinion, that's why it's been garnished with this piece of filth called a video, in order to sell it to the vapid dregs of society who still suscribe to this bint, claiming that she's an icon. She is not an icon. She is an utter fruit, who I want off my telly.
In short, this video simply proves the point that the video as a supplement to the art form is music is a redundant argument, as this is nor a supplement to the song, nor is the video art. It is purile filth, something that would make even the staunchest anti-feminist woman raise an eyebrow, and the kind of thing that even sex offenders would find hard to watch. Get this woman locked up, before she puts the video of her last gynaecology appointment with her next single.
The video for 'Telephone' by Lady Gaga and Beyonce
As I need something to occupy me until the Grand Prix is on iplayer, and my English dissertation is much less inviting, i'll share my thoughts on the latest abhorrant clip from the worlds must bland popstar.
Since the invention of MTV, music started to go down the pan. Very rarely has the music video actually been used for any purpose beneficial to the music on store, often the video serves only to show some flesh in a desperate attempt to shift some more records from whatever cookie-cutter shite is the heart-throb of all fat 12 year old girls everywhere. There have been classic videos. Foo Fighters have a knack for doing good videos, Thriller by Michael Jackson is always a classic, and Pulp always had good videos, even if some were a bit odd.
Unfortunately however, for every good story told through a video/song combinatin (Stan by Eminem and Dido just came into my head), there are at least 10 band and unimaginitve songs with even more bland and unimaginitive videos to go with them. One Shot by JLS springs to mind, where one of the band members comes to the fore, doesn't even sing a word, simply pulling down the collar of his ill-fitting t-shirt to expose his pecs (remiscent of the photo of Rafferty from the party before last incidently). Fantastically arty, i'm sure you'll agree.
The level of tastelessness possible in videos however was not only surpassed, but obliterated in 2009, when 'Just Dance' hit our every sense. A wonderfully bland song that when I first heard it screamed 'get Gwen Stefani back in No Doubt,' accompanied with a video where Stefani Germanotta (I can't keep typing Gaga, sorry,) had on a rather bland hairstyle and outfit by her standards. Even still, it was rather revealing, and what she did whilst wearing it was suitably revolting, much like her nose when you see a close-up of her in the video.
Next up was.... Poker Face? Oh look, it's Just Dance with different words. Seriously, there is no difference.
Then came Bad Romance, admittedly the catchier of her songs, but still as boring and similar to the others as the rest. Germanott's solution? Take off more clothes in the video! Writhing around this time with what looks like white tape and a weird wig, backed with the kind of dancers who hadn't seen work since Luke threw the Emperor into the middle of the Death Star.
Now however, even dear Steffani has surpassed herself. Evidently she has some form of ADD, as even with record sales through the roof and a live tour which draw the starry-eyed and mindless in their droves, she has produced a 9 and a half minute video which rather than, as the length would suggest, tell a story, simply serves to prove that had this bint been around 20 years ago, she would have been sectioned under the mental health act. From the start, you know it's not going to be the most meaningful thing when she is clinging on to the inside of a jail cell wearing only nipple tape, see through stocking-y things and some pixels to cover what modesty she has left. (The best thing is, she's completely still while doing this, probably to make it easier to pixelate her penis). Moving on from this, her usual ensemble of mental outfits are on show, including a pair of specs adorned with lit fags (which she wears whilst a woman from the prison she's in who looks like Bourne villain feels her up), police tape and only police tape, some weird American flag thing, a bra and pants whilst accompanied by 5 clones dancing in a prison corridor, and the thing at the end that looks like a huge mosquito net. Oh, and she uses diet coke cans as hair rollers right before she starts singing.
So, what purpose does this serve? There's some sort of turgid Themla and Louise story rip-off, were Germanotta helps Beyonce poison her wank boyfriend, and they run away. Quite why the requires the stupid outfits and 3 minutes at the start before any singing comes in, or indeed why it's been paired with this song, which is a suitably bland piece of garbage, even by her standards. In my opinion, that's why it's been garnished with this piece of filth called a video, in order to sell it to the vapid dregs of society who still suscribe to this bint, claiming that she's an icon. She is not an icon. She is an utter fruit, who I want off my telly.
In short, this video simply proves the point that the video as a supplement to the art form is music is a redundant argument, as this is nor a supplement to the song, nor is the video art. It is purile filth, something that would make even the staunchest anti-feminist woman raise an eyebrow, and the kind of thing that even sex offenders would find hard to watch. Get this woman locked up, before she puts the video of her last gynaecology appointment with her next single.
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